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PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2018 1:34 pm 
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look_spanky wrote:
My partner has been having panic attacks and crying every day for 5 weeks, I’ve had to quit my job so we can move back to Christchurch so she can be near to family and friends. It would be fair to say it’s put quite a strain on our relationship. Especially as she takes medication but about 4 times she has come off it because she is “feeling better”, only to spiral back to rock bottom again. This has been by far the worst episode so far though. It is especially hard as I have my own issues with social anxiety which she is not very understanding of.


Sounds like she needs to accept the meds work for her.

Also if she is unsympathetic to your illness I’d be weighing up how healthy the relationship is? It seems unreasonable of her?


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2018 2:10 pm 
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Floppykid wrote:
I've just got off the phone with my sister, my mother has been diagnosed with cancer.
I don't know any details yet but I feel like I've been kicked in the chest.
It all feels so unreal.

Difficult one. My wife was diagnosed with breast cancer during 2016 and had an operation, radiation and subsequent treatment. The only advice I can give in times like these is to take it one day at a time and be supportive. For the rest one has to trust the medical professionals. I know it's easy to say "just carry on," but personally that's what's worked best for my family thus far.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 28, 2018 12:17 am 
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Floppykid wrote:
I've just got off the phone with my sister, my mother has been diagnosed with cancer.
I don't know any details yet but I feel like I've been kicked in the chest.
It all feels so unreal.


Ahh, that's shite news.

Hope it's not too serious and things work out.

Kia kaha.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 28, 2018 6:59 am 
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Pat the Ex Mat wrote:
Burke's Boot wrote:
Much quicker and potent than antidepressants and surprised it's taken this long to start to be well known:

http://www.smh.com.au/national/health/i ... zll4t.html


You've been told to take your Quackery off this thread....

:roll:


English comprehension still not a strong point?


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 28, 2018 2:01 pm 
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Floppykid wrote:
I've just got off the phone with my sister, my mother has been diagnosed with cancer.
I don't know any details yet but I feel like I've been kicked in the chest.
It all feels so unreal.


Bastard of a disease. Once you get the details then you'll do what we all do and pump the internet for information, much of which will only serve to melt your head more. Be there for her - for them if the pair of them are still trucking together; the partners tend to take a hammering during all of this - as much as it's possible to be.

My own Mum got her diagnosis some years ago. Treatment including surgery. She had about as successful a surgical outcome as they could have hoped for so was lucky in that regard, yet we were still told that pretty much getting another 5 years (she was in mid-70's at the time) would be about as optimistic an outcome as we could have a right to expect. Nine years on and we spent a cracking night in their company last night in West Clare, horsing into fish and chips and a few bottles of white wine.

Attitude is everything with the thing. Whether her news is good(relatively) or bad. Attitude. I hope your Mum's as lucky as mine was Floppy.


Last edited by redderneck on Sun Jan 28, 2018 4:46 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 28, 2018 2:05 pm 
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Shite news floppy, but hopefully it's been caught early and the treatment starts soon. My mother had breast cancer a few years back, it was a kick in the teeth but she went through surgery, chemo and radiation therapy and ultimately beat it. Hope it's the same situation with your mother.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 28, 2018 2:32 pm 
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Floppykid wrote:
I've just got off the phone with my sister, my mother has been diagnosed with cancer.
I don't know any details yet but I feel like I've been kicked in the chest.
It all feels so unreal.

All the best with this.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 28, 2018 8:02 pm 
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Floppykid wrote:
I've just got off the phone with my sister, my mother has been diagnosed with cancer.
I don't know any details yet but I feel like I've been kicked in the chest.
It all feels so unreal.


Sorry to hear this mate. Best wishes to you and your family.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 28, 2018 8:06 pm 
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redderneck wrote:
Floppykid wrote:
I've just got off the phone with my sister, my mother has been diagnosed with cancer.
I don't know any details yet but I feel like I've been kicked in the chest.
It all feels so unreal.


Bastard of a disease. Once you get the details then you'll do what we all do and pump the internet for information, much of which will only serve to melt your head more. Be there for her - for them if the pair of them are still trucking together; the partners tend to take a hammering during all of this - as much as it's possible to be.

My own Mum got her diagnosis some years ago. Treatment including surgery. She had about as successful a surgical outcome as they could have hoped for so was lucky in that regard, yet we were still told that pretty much getting another 5 years (she was in mid-70's at the time) would be about as optimistic an outcome as we could have a right to expect. Nine years on and we spent a cracking night in their company last night in West Clare, horsing into fish and chips and a few bottles of white wine.

Attitude is everything with the thing. Whether her news is good(relatively) or bad. Attitude. I hope your Mum's as lucky as mine was Floppy.


:thumbup: Great stuff. :)


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 02, 2018 4:22 pm 
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For reasons unknown to me I keep reviewing this thread. But, glad I have, as I now need the boreds help/advice/thoughts. I have 2 teenage kids, one at Uni and one in Grade 11/Year 12/6th Form. The older one (girl) is the life and soul of any party. Tremendous athlete, loads of friends, but when she is alone she hates it and is extremely moody. Younger one (boy) is level as level can be. Never too high, never too low. Doesn't really like sports (could have put him down for that alone :lol: ) but is studious and likes English stuff, photography and oddly enough, Political Sciences. Anyway, who's more likely to get depressed????

Wrong. My boy has spoken to us about feeling depressed so we jumped on it and had him at the big hospital here in Van, and they confirmed it. Nothing too bad but enough that they have prescribed Prozac. But no other changes have really been prescribed except for maybe a bit more exercise. Of course back in 'our' day our Dads would have kicked us in the arse and told us to get outside and hit something. I have refrained from that and tried to be sympathetic to it all, which I think he is appreciative of. Anyway, Docs think we made the right decision to bring him in and praised him for coming forward voluntarily, but is Prozac the right medicine for a 16 year old? What sort of doses would one start on (he is on 10mg moving to 20mg)? Are there any other non-medicinal things we should be doing to help with general well being??

I realise it's all subjective and plan on doing my own research, but genuinely interested in the thoughts of those who may have been through this. Thx.


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 02, 2018 4:50 pm 
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Snooze wrote:
For reasons unknown to me I keep reviewing this thread. But, glad I have, as I now need the boreds help/advice/thoughts. I have 2 teenage kids, one at Uni and one in Grade 11/Year 12/6th Form. The older one (girl) is the life and soul of any party. Tremendous athlete, loads of friends, but when she is alone she hates it and is extremely moody. Younger one (boy) is level as level can be. Never too high, never too low. Doesn't really like sports (could have put him down for that alone :lol: ) but is studious and likes English stuff, photography and oddly enough, Political Sciences. Anyway, who's more likely to get depressed????

Wrong. My boy has spoken to us about feeling depressed so we jumped on it and had him at the big hospital here in Van, and they confirmed it. Nothing too bad but enough that they have prescribed Prozac. But no other changes have really been prescribed except for maybe a bit more exercise. Of course back in 'our' day our Dads would have kicked us in the arse and told us to get outside and hit something. I have refrained from that and tried to be sympathetic to it all, which I think he is appreciative of. Anyway, Docs think we made the right decision to bring him in and praised him for coming forward voluntarily, but is Prozac the right medicine for a 16 year old? What sort of doses would one start on (he is on 10mg moving to 20mg)? Are there any other non-medicinal things we should be doing to help with general well being??

I realise it's all subjective and plan on doing my own research, but genuinely interested in the thoughts of those who may have been through this. Thx.


Avoid the prozac until you deem it an absolute necessity. try a well qualified councilor in CBT first, will help with coping techniques and give someone to talk to outside immediate circle which may be easier, especially for a male.


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 02, 2018 4:52 pm 
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Certainly no expert, Snooze, but what's his friend situation like? Does he have hobbies? School counsellors can (and, unfortunately, sometimes not) help in such situations more as they'd be more likely - I hope - to know all about the issues teens go through.

It can be such a minefield given what all teens go through, and I certainly sympathise with parents going through those years with them. One thing that irked me, though, when staff suspected a child at a former school was 'at risk', is that they wanted to bombard her with things to do and sent kids to try and make friends, etc. When I talked to her about it, noticing some similarities in the way I was at that age, it really seemed like she was super introverted and just taking her time to get adjusted to the new school. I learned that she still kept in touch with her best friends in Alberta via fb messenger and eventually found a small, but solid group of friends who shared the same interests (as is preferred by introverts).

I joke with my best friend that it's a wonder we even found each other because we've both been accused of being 'recluses' in the past, and this is something I've been cognisant of in my library career. What are ways we can help connect people who don't (or are even fearful of) seek out like-minded people?

There's probably no solid advice in there, and I hope this is nothing too major, but I think it's really a good step for your son to identify this. Hopefully he finds the best solution soon.


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 02, 2018 5:14 pm 
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frillage, that was my initial thought too. Just doing some reading now (when I should be working), it seems there is mixed feelings in the medical industry about any drugs for teens. Will have that discussion with the Mrs tonight. We are trying to find a good psychologist now - were given some names from the doc. Hopefully (for me anyway) they can get him sorted and off the drugs. I'd rather he had regular visits to the quack than regularly took Prozac.

Neigs, without you knowing him, you've nailed him. Reclusive of sorts, but does have some regular friends in school. But he goes to the big Catholic school here and so travels an hour to get there. Which means he doesn't have friends "at his front door". That's our fault but it's a great school and he is resigned to being there for his last year and a half. We (wifey) have the talk tonight about what, if anything, to tell them. He doesn't seem to want people to know, but I'm not sure that's healthy (natural though).

Minefield - we have fcuking found it. :frown:


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 02, 2018 8:03 pm 
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Better to have found the minefield by spotting the warning signs than by hearing the first loud bang. And he feels solid enough with you that he spoke his mind?

Good parenting out of you both. Good luck with what follows.


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 02, 2018 9:54 pm 
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redderneck wrote:
Better to have found the minefield by spotting the warning signs than by hearing the first loud bang. And he feels solid enough with you that he spoke his mind?

Good parenting out of you both. Good luck with what follows.


One assumes you know that copious quantities of wine each night = good parenting. :lol:

But seriously, thanks. I do think it's more that he has his head screwed on well and knows there is a better life for him out there. Either way, we'll take it/him.

Trying to get him lined up with a CBT expert now. Glad I stuck with this thread now. :blush:


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PostPosted: Sat Feb 03, 2018 1:23 am 
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6c9Uu5eILZ8


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 1:35 pm 
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I'm sat in the M62 services between Leeds and Bradford and I can't stop crying. An over whelming sadness has overcome me and I just cant stop crying and I don't know why. What is wrong with me


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 1:41 pm 
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I've tried to drive on but I've had to stop again. My body wont stop shaking and I can't stop f**king crying. I just don't want to keep feeling this pain


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 1:43 pm 
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DragonKhan wrote:
I've tried to drive on but I've had to stop again. My body wont stop shaking and I can't stop f**king crying. I just don't want to keep feeling this pain


Dont drive and call someone buddy.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 1:44 pm 
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I experienced that once. It does feel dreadful I agree. It will pass.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 1:45 pm 
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Dork Lard wrote:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6c9Uu5eILZ8



Huge fan of JBP (as evident in another thread) so not critiquing him at all....

But talking about somebody who is depressed, saying "use whatever rope somebody throws at you" is maybe not the best phrase to use. ;)


Sorry, it's my sick sense of humour coming out again.

I'm in an exceptionally dark place again, which is why I've actually been avoiding this thread for a while. It's as bad, if not worse, as the time this thread was started (and the reason for its existence in the first place). No idea why that's always when my darkest humour tends to come to the fore.


Wishing everybody good luck with their fight against the dragon.


Last edited by troglodiet on Mon Feb 05, 2018 1:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 1:46 pm 
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There is nothing wrong with you BTW. It may be that on some level you do know why you are feeling like this


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 1:48 pm 
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La soule wrote:
DragonKhan wrote:
I've tried to drive on but I've had to stop again. My body wont stop shaking and I can't stop f**king crying. I just don't want to keep feeling this pain


Dont drive and call someone buddy.




So much this.

Park the car, get your arse in a coffee shop (NOT a pub), and wait for someone to come and get you. If there's anything you needed to do (go to work, meeting etc.) just phone in and say you won't be able to make it. Or get the person who comes to pick you up to phone in.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 1:48 pm 
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troglodiet wrote:
Dork Lard wrote:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6c9Uu5eILZ8



Huge fan of JBP (as evident in another thread) so not critiquing him at all....

But talking about somebody who is depressed, saying "use whatever rope somebody throws at you" is maybe not the best phrase to use. ;)


Sorry, it's my sick sense of humour coming out again.

I'm in an exceptionally dark place again, which is why I've actually been avoiding this thread for a while. It's as bad, of not worse, as the time this thread was started (and the reason for its existence in the first place). No idea why that's always when my darkest humour tends to come to the fore.


Wishing everybody good luck with their fight against the dragon.


Umlazi ?


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 1:49 pm 
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troglodiet wrote:
La soule wrote:
DragonKhan wrote:
I've tried to drive on but I've had to stop again. My body wont stop shaking and I can't stop f**king crying. I just don't want to keep feeling this pain


Dont drive and call someone buddy.




So much this.

Park the car, get your arse in a coffee shop (NOT a pub), and wait for someone to come and get you. If there's anything you needed to do (go to work, meeting etc.) just phone in and say you won't be able to make it. Or get the person who comes to pick you up to phone in.

:thumbup:


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 1:54 pm 
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DragonKhan wrote:
I'm sat in the M62 services between Leeds and Bradford and I can't stop crying. An over whelming sadness has overcome me and I just cant stop crying and I don't know why. What is wrong with me


Nothing is wrong with you. Find somewhere nice and go chill there for a while.

Oh, and read this:
https://www.theplayerstribune.com/harry ... ro-to-100/ :thumbup:


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 2:07 pm 
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I've called work and explained. I have calmed myself down enough that I am ok to drive now.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 2:07 pm 
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I'm preparing for a negative answer to a application for what would be for me a dream job. i know its gonna devastate me completely for at least 2 weeks.
Not looking forward to it.

Having a very hard time with the casual francophobia after the irish win. They way they're going on you'd think they lost, but no. classless doesn't even begin to express it. Sour f**king grapefruits. They can all go fudge themselves.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 2:07 pm 
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backrow wrote:
troglodiet wrote:
Dork Lard wrote:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6c9Uu5eILZ8



Huge fan of JBP (as evident in another thread) so not critiquing him at all....

But talking about somebody who is depressed, saying "use whatever rope somebody throws at you" is maybe not the best phrase to use. ;)


Sorry, it's my sick sense of humour coming out again.

I'm in an exceptionally dark place again, which is why I've actually been avoiding this thread for a while. It's as bad, of not worse, as the time this thread was started (and the reason for its existence in the first place). No idea why that's always when my darkest humour tends to come to the fore.


Wishing everybody good luck with their fight against the dragon.


Umlazi ?

I shouldn't but... :lol:

I suspect that will hit Trog's funny bone. If not, sorry. :blush:


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 2:08 pm 
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DragonKhan wrote:
I've called work and explained. I have calmed myself down enough that I am ok to drive now.


Good to hear. Remember that it is alright to look after yourself as a priority at times like this.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 2:08 pm 
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DragonKhan wrote:
I've called work and explained. I have calmed myself down enough that I am ok to drive now.

Good stuff.

Hope you get over it soon.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 2:14 pm 
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I am feeling a bit depressed about a couple of surgeries not gone well over the last 2 yrs. Eye surgery which has left my right eye very blurred.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 2:16 pm 
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i know its gonna devastate me completely for at least 2 weeks.
Not looking forward to it.


If you think like this it's going to happen. Do yourself a favour and just let it affect you for a day, if you have to.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 2:20 pm 
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Kiwias wrote:
DragonKhan wrote:
I've called work and explained. I have calmed myself down enough that I am ok to drive now.


Good to hear. Remember that it is alright to look after yourself as a priority at times like this.



I've been a bit of an emotional wreck all weekend. The missus mentioned something about my dad (serious issues there) and I had to leave the room yesterday as I started crying. And this morning I had a falling out with the missus and on top of everything it has set me over the edge I think. I've rang my gp and I've been referred to a councillor for an assessment now


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 2:23 pm 
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DragonKhan wrote:
Kiwias wrote:
DragonKhan wrote:
I've called work and explained. I have calmed myself down enough that I am ok to drive now.


Good to hear. Remember that it is alright to look after yourself as a priority at times like this.



I've been a bit of an emotional wreck all weekend. The missus mentioned something about my dad (serious issues there) and I had to leave the room yesterday as I started crying. And this morning I had a falling out with the missus and on top of everything it has set me over the edge I think. I've rang my gp and I've been referred to a councillor for an assessment now


Good on you.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 2:43 pm 
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Heymans wrote:
I'm preparing for a negative answer to a application for what would be for me a dream job. i know its gonna devastate me completely for at least 2 weeks.
Not looking forward to it.

Having a very hard time with the casual francophobia after the irish win. They way they're going on you'd think they lost, but no. classless doesn't even begin to express it. Sour f**king grapefruits. They can all go fudge themselves.


I am not sure what to make of this post on this thread


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 3:21 pm 
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I am home safe anyway. the tears have stopped and my body has relaxed. Got a few messages of support from HR and people at work which has lifted my spirits a bit


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 3:24 pm 
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100MileDad wrote:
Quote:
i know its gonna devastate me completely for at least 2 weeks.
Not looking forward to it.


If you think like this it's going to happen. Do yourself a favour and just let it affect you for a day, if you have to.


Me thinking about it or not has no bearing on the actual decision.

The NO will break me though. I dunno I can limit it to 1 day though.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 3:39 pm 
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Heymans wrote:
100MileDad wrote:
Quote:
i know its gonna devastate me completely for at least 2 weeks.
Not looking forward to it.


If you think like this it's going to happen. Do yourself a favour and just let it affect you for a day, if you have to.


Me thinking about it or not has no bearing on the actual decision.

The NO will break me though. I dunno I can limit it to 1 day though.


Yo thinking about how devastated you will be will not alter the outcome. You may well get the job.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 05, 2018 3:45 pm 
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DragonKhan wrote:
I am home safe anyway. the tears have stopped and my body has relaxed. Got a few messages of support from HR and people at work which has lifted my spirits a bit


Good to hear and it must be encouraging to know they care


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