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What's the right decision?
Jeff, you're being a knob, you really ought to chip in with the rest of the office 10%  10%  [ 10 ]
Jeff, you're right, you shouldn't have to clean it if you never use it 90%  90%  [ 88 ]
Total votes : 98
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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:49 am 
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Jeff the Bear wrote:
So, a conundrum for the noted intellectual and philosophical giants of the bored. We've had a flash new coffee machine put in at work (the thing looks like one of those ones you get in coffee shops but with a digital display). However, it's so flash, it needs to be cleaned every day. One of the top coffee drinkers in the office put an email out to suggest that everyone in the office should take turns (in an effort to make sure that the cleaning doesn't just fall upon the pool of secretaries).

I instantly asked whether people (i.e. people like me) who don't drink coffee would be expected to clean it. The fella said yes. I said no chance...and now there's a split emerging within the office of those that think everyone should do their bit, and people (obviously those that don't actually drink coffee) who think that asking people who don't drink coffee to clean the coffee machine is taking the piss.

So, what is the right answer?


Tell the lad to fook off.

/thread.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:50 am 
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guy smiley wrote:
Jeff the Bear wrote:
J Man wrote:
Look how one sided the voting is FFS. This one is easy.


Yeah. I though it was obvious, but there was enough people in the office who thought otherwise to make me question myself (and thereby make me start this thread to see if I was in fact on the wrong side of what most people might think is reasonable).


So you come here, a place populate heavily by reactionary conservative cnuts to have your views validated :thumbup:



Do only liberal people clean other peoples coffee machines?


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:51 am 
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True Blue wrote:
guy smiley wrote:
Jeff the Bear wrote:
J Man wrote:
Look how one sided the voting is FFS. This one is easy.


Yeah. I though it was obvious, but there was enough people in the office who thought otherwise to make me question myself (and thereby make me start this thread to see if I was in fact on the wrong side of what most people might think is reasonable).


So you come here, a place populate heavily by reactionary conservative cnuts to have your views validated :thumbup:



Do only liberal people clean other peoples coffee machines?


Bingo :thumbup:


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:52 am 
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Clean it but do a very sloppy job, maybe get people sick.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:52 am 
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Do you ever provide coffee for your clients when they visit (if you have them)?

If that's the case then you probably should take your part in cleaning, if not then nope.

Although, that will all be mitigated if you are a tea drinker and you drop your bags in the sink. In that case I'm on coffee cleaner's side.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:52 am 
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Gavin Henson


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:54 am 
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Tell the caffeine addict to go swivel on it.
I'm assuming you weren't consulted for your opinion on the procurement of the coffee machine. If you were you surely wouldn't have picked one that requires daily maintenance by the office staff. Tell the guys he's way offside on this occasion like Richie McAwe offside.


Last edited by YOYO on Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:55 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:54 am 
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UncleFB wrote:
Do you ever provide coffee for your clients when they visit (if you have them)?

If that's the case then you probably should take your part in cleaning, if not then nope.

Although, that will all be mitigated if you are a tea drinker and you drop your bags in the sink. In that case I'm on coffee cleaner's side.


Well that was the other point made. Actually, all my clients don't drink coffee, so I've never had to make coffee the entire two years I've been there, whether for myself or someone else.

Having said that, all clients are the companies clients and they all pay a bit of my wage, so to that end, they may have a point.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:56 am 
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You’ll probably find that your colleagues will be more than happy for you to abstain from the whole cleaning thing if you threaten to slit their throats if the topic is brought up for discussion again.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:57 am 
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Rows about coffee machines, insisting on corner desks.

Your workplace sounds like a joy 😉


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:57 am 
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Employ some Kiwis.
Every time you head towards it at least two will block your path.
Excuse for not doing it sorted......


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:57 am 
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18ChinsOfChinatown wrote:
You’ll probably find that your colleagues will be more than happy for you to abstain from the whole cleaning thing if you threaten to slit their throats if the topic is brought up for discussion again.


Exactly.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:04 am 
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True Blue wrote:
But seriously, cleaning a coffee machine that you don't even use :lol:

Just don't do it. What are they going to do?


:lol: That's what I was thinking. Or just say you did, if they don't like you're cleaning methods they can take you off the roster.

They should just pay someone extra to take care of it. Everyone can put in and they look after the kitchen area in general and everyone's happy. :thumbup:


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:05 am 
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eugenefraxby wrote:
Employ some Kiwis.
Every time you head towards it at least two will block your path.
Excuse for not doing it sorted......

;)


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:07 am 
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If it's used significantly for clients as well, then it is a bit more of a genuine public service machine.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:08 am 
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Do what we did

Put in an on-site barista


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:09 am 
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Jeff the Bear wrote:
So, what is the right answer?


If you use it, clean it. Simples.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:09 am 
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AD345 wrote:
Do what we did

Put in an on-site barista


Class.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:12 am 
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Point out that the coffee machine is becoming divisive and demand that it be removed in order to further office harmony.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:14 am 
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The fact you asked shows you know the right answer. It's part of the 'no dickheads' workplace culture, pitch in as part of the team.

Any PR application pending? This will be part of the consideration.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:17 am 
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Confused, do you not have cleaners?


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:22 am 
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The best way to solve this conundrum is to ask yourself, what would Jeremy Corbyn do?

The answer then is obvious; the rota should be determined on the basis of who is paid the most. Those paid more than 80K a year should clean the coffee machine for the rest of the office. Anyone paid less than 80K should never have to clean the machine. Indeed, the rich bastards should also serve the coffee to the rest to atone for their personal wealth.

If JtB is paid less than 80K, the boundary could be adjusted to make sure he is included in the group of staff responsible for cleaning the machine and serving coffees to the other downtrodden workers.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:23 am 
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Lobby wrote:
The best way to solve this conundrum is to ask yourself, what would Jeremy Corbyn do?

The answer then is obvious; the rota should be determined on the basis of who is paid the most. Those paid more than 80K a year should clean the coffee machine for the rest of the office. Anyone paid less than 80K should never have to clean the machine. Indeed, the rich bastards should also serve the coffee to the rest to atone for their personal wealth.

If JtB is paid less than 80K, the boundary could be adjusted to make sure he is included in the group of staff responsible for cleaning the machine and serving coffees to the other downtrodden workers.

:lol: :lol: :thumbup:


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:25 am 
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Not only refuse to clean it, but ask that all the coffee drinkers take a pay cut on account of the getting a free perk :evil:


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:27 am 
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Have you tried threatening to punch them in the face?


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:30 am 
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There are 2 of us in the office who don't drink tea or coffee. The other 10 tried and failed to get us to make tea or Nespresso coffees as part of the rota.
Fugg 'em. :nod:


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:30 am 
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Don't fücking clean it.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:40 am 
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Toro wrote:
True Blue wrote:
But seriously, cleaning a coffee machine that you don't even use :lol:

Just don't do it. What are they going to do?


:lol: That's what I was thinking. Or just say you did, if they don't like you're cleaning methods they can take you off the roster.

They should just pay someone extra to take care of it. Everyone can put in and they look after the kitchen area in general and everyone's happy. :thumbup:


This is the one. Lie.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:42 am 
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Why not take them on a wager on the Test series. If the Lions win you will clean it everyday and if the ABs win you don't have to. You can't lose.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:43 am 
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Zakar wrote:
Yes you should.

It's a public benefit. Like public education or transport. You might not use it, but you still indirectly benefit from it (via people not being caffeine starved plum, and being more productive).

Anyway thats he best argument I can make for you to clean it.


Rubbish- if you are genuinely a non
Coffee drinker as opposed to 'not drinking enough to warrant cleaning duties'. drinker I would say over to the coffee drinkers.

You wouldn't ask a non rugby player to take turns cleaning the boots ffs


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:45 am 
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Install one of these in the office. Explain that it's a communal asset, and for the sake of office harmony, etc., it's only reasonable, etc...

https://synergybrew.com/15-gallon-home-brewing-system


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:49 am 
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I've been thinking about this, most likely because I have nothing better to do in my life and I'm a loser.

Just lie. If the office is against you just meekly join the rota. Then just don't clean it. Once the conversation comes up, follow this important guideline


Smug Coffee Drinking Hipster Fvck Face: Jeff, did you clean the machine yesterday?
Jeff The Welsh Cretin: Yes
SCDHFF: But the machine is still dirty. Also, it smells of urine?!
JTWC: Fvck your face. I will cut you.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:53 am 
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Openside wrote:
Zakar wrote:
Yes you should.

It's a public benefit. Like public education or transport. You might not use it, but you still indirectly benefit from it (via people not being caffeine starved plum, and being more productive).

Anyway thats he best argument I can make for you to clean it.


Rubbish- if you are genuinely a non
Coffee drinker as opposed to 'not drinking enough to warrant cleaning duties'. drinker I would say over to the coffee drinkers.

You wouldn't ask a non rugby player to take turns cleaning the boots ffs


Rugby boots aren't a common good.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:56 am 
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If someone asked me to help clean a communal coffee machine when I don't drink coffee, I'd tell them to get f**ked.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:58 am 
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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:58 am 
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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:59 am 
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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 12:02 pm 
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happyhooker wrote:
Rows about coffee machines, insisting on corner desks.

Your workplace sounds like a joy 😉


Hmmm... any insight onto the root cause of these issues?
KG


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 12:03 pm 
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AD345 wrote:
Do what we did

Put in an on-site barista


I would take an unemployed person off the street.
KG


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 12:09 pm 
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On a tangent...

What type of shoddy company provides a facility but doesnt provide for its operating costs?

That's like building a school and then realising feck... we need teachers also.

What industry are you in? I hope its not one with forward planning...?

Also, whats wrong with filter coffee? Easy to clean tastes shite but wakes you up like a an alarm going off 10 minutes after you were supposed to be at work.


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