Page 2 of 5

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:52 am
by Morgan14
Gavin Henson

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:54 am
by Jeff the Bear
UncleFB wrote:Do you ever provide coffee for your clients when they visit (if you have them)?

If that's the case then you probably should take your part in cleaning, if not then nope.

Although, that will all be mitigated if you are a tea drinker and you drop your bags in the sink. In that case I'm on coffee cleaner's side.
Well that was the other point made. Actually, all my clients don't drink coffee, so I've never had to make coffee the entire two years I've been there, whether for myself or someone else.

Having said that, all clients are the companies clients and they all pay a bit of my wage, so to that end, they may have a point.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:56 am
by 18ChinsOfChinatown
You’ll probably find that your colleagues will be more than happy for you to abstain from the whole cleaning thing if you threaten to slit their throats if the topic is brought up for discussion again.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:57 am
by happyhooker
Rows about coffee machines, insisting on corner desks.

Your workplace sounds like a joy 😉

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:57 am
by eugenefraxby
Employ some Kiwis.
Every time you head towards it at least two will block your path.
Excuse for not doing it sorted......

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:57 am
by True Blue
18ChinsOfChinatown wrote:You’ll probably find that your colleagues will be more than happy for you to abstain from the whole cleaning thing if you threaten to slit their throats if the topic is brought up for discussion again.
Exactly.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:04 am
by Toro
True Blue wrote:But seriously, cleaning a coffee machine that you don't even use :lol:

Just don't do it. What are they going to do?
:lol: That's what I was thinking. Or just say you did, if they don't like you're cleaning methods they can take you off the roster.

They should just pay someone extra to take care of it. Everyone can put in and they look after the kitchen area in general and everyone's happy. :thumbup:

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:05 am
by Toro
eugenefraxby wrote:Employ some Kiwis.
Every time you head towards it at least two will block your path.
Excuse for not doing it sorted......
;)

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:07 am
by Raggs
If it's used significantly for clients as well, then it is a bit more of a genuine public service machine.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:08 am
by AD345
Do what we did

Put in an on-site barista

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:09 am
by Tehui
Jeff the Bear wrote: So, what is the right answer?
If you use it, clean it. Simples.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:09 am
by Toro
AD345 wrote:Do what we did

Put in an on-site barista
Class.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:12 am
by Shrekles
Point out that the coffee machine is becoming divisive and demand that it be removed in order to further office harmony.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:14 am
by Mr Mike
The fact you asked shows you know the right answer. It's part of the 'no dickheads' workplace culture, pitch in as part of the team.

Any PR application pending? This will be part of the consideration.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:17 am
by eugenefraxby
Confused, do you not have cleaners?

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:22 am
by Lobby
The best way to solve this conundrum is to ask yourself, what would Jeremy Corbyn do?

The answer then is obvious; the rota should be determined on the basis of who is paid the most. Those paid more than 80K a year should clean the coffee machine for the rest of the office. Anyone paid less than 80K should never have to clean the machine. Indeed, the rich bastards should also serve the coffee to the rest to atone for their personal wealth.

If JtB is paid less than 80K, the boundary could be adjusted to make sure he is included in the group of staff responsible for cleaning the machine and serving coffees to the other downtrodden workers.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:25 am
by merlin the happy pig
Not only refuse to clean it, but ask that all the coffee drinkers take a pay cut on account of the getting a free perk :evil:

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:27 am
by Zakar
Have you tried threatening to punch them in the face?

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:30 am
by Sandstorm
There are 2 of us in the office who don't drink tea or coffee. The other 10 tried and failed to get us to make tea or Nespresso coffees as part of the rota.
Fugg 'em. :nod:

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:30 am
by Hawk97
Don't fücking clean it.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:40 am
by Santa
Toro wrote:
True Blue wrote:But seriously, cleaning a coffee machine that you don't even use :lol:

Just don't do it. What are they going to do?
:lol: That's what I was thinking. Or just say you did, if they don't like you're cleaning methods they can take you off the roster.

They should just pay someone extra to take care of it. Everyone can put in and they look after the kitchen area in general and everyone's happy. :thumbup:
This is the one. Lie.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:42 am
by CrazyIslander
Why not take them on a wager on the Test series. If the Lions win you will clean it everyday and if the ABs win you don't have to. You can't lose.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:43 am
by Openside
Zakar wrote:Yes you should.

It's a public benefit. Like public education or transport. You might not use it, but you still indirectly benefit from it (via people not being caffeine starved plum, and being more productive).

Anyway thats he best argument I can make for you to clean it.
Rubbish- if you are genuinely a non
Coffee drinker as opposed to 'not drinking enough to warrant cleaning duties'. drinker I would say over to the coffee drinkers.

You wouldn't ask a non rugby player to take turns cleaning the boots ffs

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:45 am
by TheDocForgotHisLogon
Install one of these in the office. Explain that it's a communal asset, and for the sake of office harmony, etc., it's only reasonable, etc...

https://synergybrew.com/15-gallon-home-brewing-system

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:49 am
by True Blue
I've been thinking about this, most likely because I have nothing better to do in my life and I'm a loser.

Just lie. If the office is against you just meekly join the rota. Then just don't clean it. Once the conversation comes up, follow this important guideline


Smug Coffee Drinking Hipster Fvck Face: Jeff, did you clean the machine yesterday?
Jeff The Welsh Cretin: Yes
SCDHFF: But the machine is still dirty. Also, it smells of urine?!
JTWC: Fvck your face. I will cut you.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:53 am
by Zakar
Openside wrote:
Zakar wrote:Yes you should.

It's a public benefit. Like public education or transport. You might not use it, but you still indirectly benefit from it (via people not being caffeine starved plum, and being more productive).

Anyway thats he best argument I can make for you to clean it.
Rubbish- if you are genuinely a non
Coffee drinker as opposed to 'not drinking enough to warrant cleaning duties'. drinker I would say over to the coffee drinkers.

You wouldn't ask a non rugby player to take turns cleaning the boots ffs
Rugby boots aren't a common good.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:56 am
by Ali's Choice
If someone asked me to help clean a communal coffee machine when I don't drink coffee, I'd tell them to get f**ked.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 12:02 pm
by kiwigreg369
happyhooker wrote:Rows about coffee machines, insisting on corner desks.

Your workplace sounds like a joy 😉
Hmmm... any insight onto the root cause of these issues?
KG

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 12:03 pm
by kiwigreg369
AD345 wrote:Do what we did

Put in an on-site barista
I would take an unemployed person off the street.
KG

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 12:09 pm
by nardol
On a tangent...

What type of shoddy company provides a facility but doesnt provide for its operating costs?

That's like building a school and then realising feck... we need teachers also.

What industry are you in? I hope its not one with forward planning...?

Also, whats wrong with filter coffee? Easy to clean tastes shite but wakes you up like a an alarm going off 10 minutes after you were supposed to be at work.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 12:16 pm
by TheDocForgotHisLogon
nardol wrote:On a tangent...

What type of shoddy company provides a facility but doesnt provide for its operating costs?

That's like building a school and then realising feck... we need teachers also.

What industry are you in? I hope its not one with forward planning...?

Also, whats wrong with filter coffee? Easy to clean tastes shite but wakes you up like a an alarm going off 10 minutes after you were supposed to be at work.
Fairly common for nice-to-haves to get employee support? E.g. Friday drinks at my current client is on a rota basis for setup, bar service, and clean-up. The worm farm (yes really) at a previous place was shared by the people that took the work piss home. Etc...

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 12:17 pm
by Bullettyme
I wouldn't do it. Unless you drink coffee, or give your clients coffee. Or do you use hot water, etc. from it?

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 12:17 pm
by GDBFC99
Next thing they'll ask you to empty the ashtrays outside. Ridiculous request, is that guy from management?

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 12:20 pm
by Lorthern Nights
Interesting that a few of our politically left leaning posters don't think that comrade Jeff should do his bit for the common good, indeed the thread starter is usually one of the placard wavers...

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 12:43 pm
by eugenefraxby
This really is informative. People regard worm piss as a benefit ??

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 12:47 pm
by bessantj
Lorthern Nights wrote:Interesting that a few of our politically left leaning posters don't think that comrade Jeff should do his bit for the common good, indeed the thread starter is usually one of the placard wavers...
As a living, breathing socialist I believe that we should only drink water.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 12:50 pm
by TheDocForgotHisLogon
eugenefraxby wrote:This really is informative. People regard worm piss as a benefit ??
Well not as a substitute for money. That aside, does the veges the world of good.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 12:54 pm
by A5D5E5
I doubt that anyone would ask Manny Pacquiao to clean the coffee machine.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 12:58 pm
by bimboman
Lorthern Nights wrote:Interesting that a few of our politically left leaning posters don't think that comrade Jeff should do his bit for the common good, indeed the thread starter is usually one of the placard wavers...

:lol: , I had noticed.

Re: The Moral Maze with Jeff the Bear - Coffee Related Conun

Posted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 1:03 pm
by Ted.
Jeff the Bear wrote:
So, what is the right answer?

Either don't clean it, or pour epoxy resin down the guts of the thing latish one evening.