Chat Forum
It is currently Wed Jul 18, 2018 1:44 pm

All times are UTC [ DST ]




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 260 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 ... 7  Next
Author Message
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 6:57 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 21590
#1 long itchy nostril hairs that cause you to pass out when you pluck them


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 6:59 pm 
Offline

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 40166
Location: Dublin
Uncle Fester wrote:
#1 long itchy nostril hairs that cause you to pass out when you pluck them


I've a nose trimmer. Great so they are.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 7:00 pm 
Online
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jul 31, 2013 10:58 am
Posts: 20997
Hangovers lasting 2-3 days x(


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 7:01 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 21590
It's the thin ones embedded in soft skin that are the problem. The thick ones come out easily enough.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 7:04 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 6147
Location: LOL! WISDOM!
Your arse disappears.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 7:12 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 923
That your balls will end up resembling two breaker marbles in a tube sock....and that you might accidentally sit on your own balls whilst getting seated in an airplane seat :shock:


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 7:28 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 22329
Location: End of the road, turn right and first house on the left
chicharino wrote:
That your balls will end up resembling two breaker marbles in a tube sock....and that you might accidentally sit on your own balls whilst getting seated in an airplane seat :shock:


:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Ah, the oldies "Gotcha" moment

(There's a worse one to come involving danglies and loose underwear)


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 7:34 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 9602
HighKingLeinster wrote:
Hangovers lasting 2-3 days x(


You're not practising enough.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 7:58 pm 
Offline

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 18263
Itchy bell ends in meetings


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 8:01 pm 
Offline

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 1:44 pm
Posts: 46749
Location: In the Centre/left wing
Erections last much longer after 40 and you start to be much more self confident and tell naysayers to feck off


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 8:13 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 18642
HighKingLeinster wrote:
Hangovers lasting 2-3 days x(

Man up petal


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 8:17 pm 
Offline

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 8412
Location: Florida
message #2527204 wrote:
Your arse disappears.


Squats and deadlifts are your friend

Otherwise you are going to have to get someone to help you get off the shitter when you get older


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 8:25 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Sun May 28, 2017 2:38 am
Posts: 823
Location: NZ
You go to as many funerals as weddings


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 8:25 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 5977
Location: Madrid
chicharino wrote:
That your balls will end up resembling two breaker marbles in a tube sock....and that you might accidentally sit on your own balls whilst getting seated in an airplane seat :shock:


:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 8:30 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Thu Jun 11, 2015 1:25 pm
Posts: 4702
Location: Leafy Cheshire
Your knees cease to function meaning just getting up in the morning is a challenge


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 8:30 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 6827
argus wrote:
message #2527204 wrote:
Your arse disappears.


Squats and deadlifts are your friend

Otherwise you are going to have to get someone to help you get off the shitter when you get older


and you are continually recovering from injury


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 8:35 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 6147
Location: LOL! WISDOM!
_fatprop wrote:
argus wrote:
message #2527204 wrote:
Your arse disappears.


Squats and deadlifts are your friend

Otherwise you are going to have to get someone to help you get off the shitter when you get older


and you are continually recovering from injury


Quote:
Your knees cease to function meaning just getting up in the morning is a challenge


..and your hips. Makes squats and deadlifts a little more difficult.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 8:35 pm 
Offline

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 3020
Location: The Royal Borough of Windsor and Maidenhead..Peasants..
You make the same noise sitting down as getting up..


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 8:39 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Sat Feb 04, 2012 7:44 pm
Posts: 14903
What about turkey neck? When your neck skin becomes saggy and wrinkly.

I supppose baldness and / or grey hair.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 8:50 pm 
Offline

Joined: Fri May 04, 2012 7:12 pm
Posts: 2968
c69 wrote:
Erections last much longer after 40 (and harder and harder to get every year AFTER 65 :(( ) and you start to be much more self confident and tell naysayers to feck off


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 9:03 pm 
Offline

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 8412
Location: Florida
message #2527204 wrote:
_fatprop wrote:
argus wrote:
message #2527204 wrote:
Your arse disappears.


Squats and deadlifts are your friend

Otherwise you are going to have to get someone to help you get off the shitter when you get older


and you are continually recovering from injury


Quote:
Your knees cease to function meaning just getting up in the morning is a challenge


..and your hips. Makes squats and deadlifts a little more difficult.


May as well throw in the towel and slide into a pair of Depends then


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 9:10 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 6147
Location: LOL! WISDOM!
argus wrote:
message #2527204 wrote:
_fatprop wrote:
argus wrote:
message #2527204 wrote:
Your arse disappears.


Squats and deadlifts are your friend

Otherwise you are going to have to get someone to help you get off the shitter when you get older


and you are continually recovering from injury


Quote:
Your knees cease to function meaning just getting up in the morning is a challenge


..and your hips. Makes squats and deadlifts a little more difficult.


May as well throw in the towel and slide into a pair of Depends then

:o ... Not at that stage...yet. But it doesn't get any better, I hear.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 9:16 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Mon Sep 07, 2015 1:18 pm
Posts: 1212
You hope that when you fart that its a fart......

Your arm get shorter making shoe lace tying fun.....

You need a bucket to put all you plastic bits in....teeth, glasses, hearing aide, etc

Get used to setting alarms off at the airport with your prosthetic hip......

Reading till 4am till youre tired enough to go to sleep.....

Combing your hair in front of a selfie instead of a mirror.......

Two walks a night......

Gout when you eat snhellfish and drink red wine or port.....

Forgetting where you put tye post it to remind you to do something.....

Doing quizes and a crosswrd with mr google.....

Having to use a rubber kneeler when gardening......

.............and rembering to take your pills each day.

But its great to be alive seeing what you kids and grandkids are up to.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 9:42 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 15061
Location: Auckland, NZ, Earth
Well at 38 I'm not really old yet, but I have noticed a few things in the last 5 years or so. Longer recovery times, a few skin blemishes, and just a bit slower off the mark when playing sport.

Oh yeah, and some hairs in my ear. Wtf


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 9:49 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 21646
True Blue wrote:
Well at 38 I'm not really old yet, but I have noticed a few things in the last 5 years or so. Longer recovery times, a few skin blemishes, and just a bit slower off the mark when playing sport.

Oh yeah, and some hairs in my ear. Wtf


They're not the only orifices so inflicted. You have been warned.

38 is a bit early for that, though. :uhoh:


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 9:57 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 20000
Ear hairs. Ear hairs that become bristly and long if not given regular attention.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 9:58 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 10057
Waking up and parts of you are already achy. WTAF?

Tolerance for alcohol decreases and it takes longer to recover from hangovers


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 9:59 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 8317
Location: Middle of the Lothians
Uncle Fester wrote:
#1 long itchy nostril hairs that cause you to pass out when you pluck them


:lol: :lol: :blush: The very thing I was doing as I opened the thread


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 10:08 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 20000
flaggETERNAL wrote:
Waking up and parts of you are already achy. WTAF?

Tolerance for alcohol decreases and it takes longer to recover from hangovers


Yes. Two day hangovers are a regular occurance. Occasionally three day :(( I get that weird terrible night sleep when I'm hungover now, and wake up the next day feeling as bad as I did the day before.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 10:08 pm 
Offline

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 23566
Luckily haven't been afflicted with any of these scourges yet given I am still in the first flush of youth.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 10:11 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Sat Feb 04, 2012 7:44 pm
Posts: 14903
Probably not an older age thing but itchy groin and ballsack. Any solution apart from amputation?


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 10:14 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 9602
Ted. wrote:
True Blue wrote:
Well at 38 I'm not really old yet, but I have noticed a few things in the last 5 years or so. Longer recovery times, a few skin blemishes, and just a bit slower off the mark when playing sport.

Oh yeah, and some hairs in my ear. Wtf


They're not the only orifices so inflicted. You have been warned.

38 is a bit early for that, though. :uhoh:


I concur. TB is going to end up one of those bald auld fuckers with what looks like black parsley growing out of their ears.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 10:15 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 9602
YOYO wrote:
Probably not an older age thing but itchy groin and ballsack. Any solution apart from amputation?


Same bogs as Yeeb. Change your vocation.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 10:15 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 21646
YOYO wrote:
Probably not an older age thing but itchy groin and ballsack. Any solution apart from amputation?


Horse liniment nails that real quick. :nod:


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 10:16 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Sat Apr 27, 2013 11:18 am
Posts: 5773
Location: The Kapiti Coast
YOYO wrote:
Probably not an older age thing but itchy groin and ballsack. Any solution apart from amputation?

Avoid sitting down for long periods of time. It's the sweat mate, the acid sweat.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 10:17 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 923
YOYO wrote:
Probably not an older age thing but itchy groin and ballsack. Any solution apart from amputation?
I give the twig and berries a good dusting of corn starch baby powder in the morning and pack a bit in the ass crack as well to cut down on any chaffing.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 10:17 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Sat Feb 04, 2012 7:44 pm
Posts: 14903
Ted. wrote:
YOYO wrote:
Probably not an older age thing but itchy groin and ballsack. Any solution apart from amputation?


Horse liniment nails that real quick. :nod:


Isn’t that for horses?
Or maybe I should have said I have a horse friend who has an itch problem.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 10:20 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 6147
Location: LOL! WISDOM!
YOYO wrote:
Probably not an older age thing but itchy groin and ballsack. Any solution apart from amputation?


Pharmacist will give you something for jock rot. And lay off the immac.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 10:20 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:05 am
Posts: 18636
On the plus side, when you hit a nice tuft with the trimmer the noise of evil hair being mangled is very satisfying.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2018 10:22 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Sat Feb 04, 2012 7:44 pm
Posts: 14903
WoodlandsRFC wrote:
YOYO wrote:
Probably not an older age thing but itchy groin and ballsack. Any solution apart from amputation?

Avoid sitting down for long periods of time. It's the sweat mate, the acid sweat.


Any old white witches remedy to cure it? Or do I just need to stitch in ventilation to my leg garments?

chicharino wrote:
YOYO wrote:
Probably not an older age thing but itchy groin and ballsack. Any solution apart from amputation?
I give the twig and berries a good dusting of corn starch baby powder in the morning and pack a bit in the ass crack as well to cut down on any chaffing.


Corn starch baby powder.. interesting. I’m seeing myself like Ross from Friends after he tries to get his skin tight black leather jeans off when entertaining a lady friend. Sounds messy.


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 260 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 ... 7  Next

All times are UTC [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Armchair_Superstar, Banana Man, Bing [Bot], CrazyIslander, Diego, Fangle, fatcat, feckwanker, Google Adsense [Bot], Gospel, guy smiley, KnuckleDragger, Laurent, Lazy Couch potato, Leffe, Mick Mannock, Mullet 2, nardol, Newsome, Pat the Ex Mat, Plato'sCave, rabble, sewa, sim_in_mel, St_Badger, Toulon's Not Toulouse, VBall, Winnie, Working Class Rugger, yaums, Zakar and 1 guest


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group