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 Post subject: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 1:34 pm 
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Why?


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 1:36 pm 
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To make films better, eg. I’m struggling to think of one shit film with a dwarf in it.


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 1:38 pm 
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They're good at killing Orcs :thumbup:


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 1:42 pm 
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they make good films

like Snow White but are generally marginalised.


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 1:45 pm 
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So happyhooker can have friends


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 1:48 pm 
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And so we can do this

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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 2:07 pm 
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Plato'sCave wrote:
To make films better, eg. I’m struggling to think of one shit film with a dwarf in it.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Isl ... prov=sfla1


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 2:29 pm 
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Last edited by Farva on Sun Jun 17, 2018 2:37 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 2:33 pm 
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Plato'sCave wrote:
To make films better, eg. I’m struggling to think of one shit film with a dwarf in it.
Holds true for documentaries also.
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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 2:42 pm 
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low to the ground so more efficient at clearing ball from the base of rucks and scrums plus shouty and intelligent to compensate for lack of height so good for directing the dullards that wear single digit numbers on their backs around the park.


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 2:46 pm 
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Niche porn.


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 2:51 pm 
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Statistically, only 1 in 7 are happy.


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 3:05 pm 
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makes list of posters on thread.


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 4:34 pm 
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At one club I used to play for (Beverley in E Yorks) there was a player who was barely 4 ft tall. He used to come training regularly and was a good lad. One day the 4th XV were short of players and he turned out. He played wing forward, but pushing in the scrum was mechanically impossible and although he could never commit a high tackle, his speed was so limited that he could never get near an opponent with the ball. Without wishing to be unkind, turning out is a great gesture, but was it worth it? Must be hard for opponents as well. There's nothing wrong with tossing a scrawny scrum half out of play, but ...


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 4:38 pm 
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Uncle Fester wrote:
Plato'sCave wrote:
To make films better, eg. I’m struggling to think of one shit film with a dwarf in it.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Isl ... prov=sfla1


Not convinced that film doesn’t have tall people kneeling on their shoes.


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 5:20 pm 
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Not to be underestimated

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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 5:29 pm 
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Dwarves


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 6:02 pm 
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message #2527204 wrote:
Dwarves


Fixed


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 7:02 pm 
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I won’t need lie , this isn’t the first internet link about dwarfs I’ve ever clicked on.
Not just pron, but was when I was trying to research Chuckles weird warhammer hobbies on that multi sided dice thread .


But mostly, just the pron.


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 7:37 pm 
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Fenman wrote:
At one club I used to play for (Beverley in E Yorks) there was a player who was barely 4 ft tall. He used to come training regularly and was a good lad. One day the 4th XV were short of players and he turned out. He played wing forward, but pushing in the scrum was mechanically impossible and although he could never commit a high tackle, his speed was so limited that he could never get near an opponent with the ball. Without wishing to be unkind, turning out is a great gesture, but was it worth it? Must be hard for opponents as well. There's nothing wrong with tossing a scrawny scrum half out of play, but ...

I played London Irish wild geese or whatever they’re called and no shit their 9 must have been a borderline dwarf, he had no legs but a normal upper body. Decent enough player tbf.


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 8:22 pm 
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Tbh, Happyhooker is not a dwarf.

He should've been a model.









Small version of the real thing...


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 8:39 pm 
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message #2527204 wrote:
Dwarves


Great band

Image


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 8:41 pm 
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message #2527204 wrote:
Dwarves


/Geek mode on

Apparently when Tolkien submitted his first draft of the hobbit, the editor corrected "dwarves" to "dwarfs". Tolkien replied that he wrote the OED (he was one of the sub editors on the first edition) and he could spell it how he liked.

He later justified it as a more accurate rendering of the original dwarfish before admitting he had made a mistake.

/Geek mode off


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 9:27 pm 
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Inch high hogs eye wrote:
message #2527204 wrote:
Dwarves


Great band

Image


Is that a record cover, or just how a standard Friday night ends up for happyhooker after he’s been to a few of the 4.3 million boozers he knows ?


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 11:15 pm 
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDWDQbdbd5c


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2018 11:58 pm 
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Quote:
What about the dwarf? Worthless.
Cut his throat.
Wait. Wait. Wait, wait, wait! Let's discuss this.
And then chop off his cock.
We'll sell it for a fortune.
A dwarf's cock has magic powers.
Wait! Wait! Wait, wait, wait! You can't just hand a dry cock to a merchant and expect him to pay for it.
He has to know it came from a dwarf.
And how could he know unless he sees the dwarf?
It will be a dwarf-sized cock.
Guess again.
The dwarf lives until we find a cock merchant...

Read more: https://www.springfieldspringfield.co.u ... ode=s05e06


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2018 12:02 am 
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What would the England rugby team do on tour without them?


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2018 1:56 am 
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Fenman wrote:
At one club I used to play for (Beverley in E Yorks) there was a player who was barely 4 ft tall. He used to come training regularly and was a good lad. One day the 4th XV were short of players and he turned out. He played wing forward, but pushing in the scrum was mechanically impossible and although he could never commit a high tackle, his speed was so limited that he could never get near an opponent with the ball. Without wishing to be unkind, turning out is a great gesture, but was it worth it? Must be hard for opponents as well. There's nothing wrong with tossing a scrawny scrum half out of play, but ...


WTF is a wing forward?


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2018 5:19 am 
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AD345 wrote:
Fenman wrote:
At one club I used to play for (Beverley in E Yorks) there was a player who was barely 4 ft tall. He used to come training regularly and was a good lad. One day the 4th XV were short of players and he turned out. He played wing forward, but pushing in the scrum was mechanically impossible and although he could never commit a high tackle, his speed was so limited that he could never get near an opponent with the ball. Without wishing to be unkind, turning out is a great gesture, but was it worth it? Must be hard for opponents as well. There's nothing wrong with tossing a scrawny scrum half out of play, but ...


WTF is a wing forward?


A small, light one that flies well when thrown.


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2018 6:35 am 
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http://www.abc.net.au/news/2013-09-03/c ... re/4932666

It's all fun and games until someone sets the dwarf on fire

And here's the AFL CEO trying to keep a straight face when quizzed on the incident

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QwzEMjIdrwU


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2018 8:07 am 
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Deadly Derek wrote:
Why?


Do you want the short answer?


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2018 8:14 am 
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Kiwias wrote:
What would the England rugby team do on tour without them?

Mike Tindall liked this post.


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2018 8:47 am 
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‘Now who can put a word starting with D in a sentence? Yes you, Little Johnny’.

‘My Uncle Henry is a dwarf!’

‘Very good, Little Johnny’ says the teacher, mightily relieved Little Johnny didn’t take the opportunity to say dick or deadshit. ‘Now please tell the class what a dwarf is.’

‘Little c unt about yea f ucken big.’


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2018 9:58 am 
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Fowler tells me that the traditional plural form in British English is dwarfs but dwarves is now increasingly being used.

The plural dwarves was probably influenced by J R R Tolkien. Both are used worldwide.


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2018 11:17 am 
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Incidentally, Warwick Davis used to live close by. He's doing some mad stunts with Bear Grylls in the lake district to be aired shortly.

Lovely man.


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2018 12:41 pm 
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Tolkien wrote fiction. Dwarves was common form well before his time.


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2018 12:53 pm 
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AD345 wrote:
Fenman wrote:
At one club I used to play for (Beverley in E Yorks) there was a player who was barely 4 ft tall. He used to come training regularly and was a good lad. One day the 4th XV were short of players and he turned out. He played wing forward, but pushing in the scrum was mechanically impossible and although he could never commit a high tackle, his speed was so limited that he could never get near an opponent with the ball. Without wishing to be unkind, turning out is a great gesture, but was it worth it? Must be hard for opponents as well. There's nothing wrong with tossing a scrawny scrum half out of play, but ...


WTF is a wing forward?


Flanker


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2018 1:14 pm 
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If 'Dwarf', 'Dwarfs' and 'Dwarfism' exist, then there should be no need for 'Dwarves'...
But imo the word 'Dwarves' looks better than 'Dwarfs' so yeah.

DuWarvvezs.. They're all Scottish, right?


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2018 1:18 pm 
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message #2527204 wrote:
Tolkien wrote fiction. Dwarves was common form well before his time.

Not sure about that, but it does seem probable although my bible on these things, Fowler, makes no reference to earlier spellings.

In any event, this thread dwarfs others in it's heavyweight approach!


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 Post subject: Re: Dwarfs
PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2018 1:28 pm 
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backrow wrote:
Inch high hogs eye wrote:
message #2527204 wrote:
Dwarves


Great band

Image


Is that a record cover, or just how a standard Friday night ends up for happyhooker after he’s been to a few of the 4.3 million boozers he knows ?


Not how I pictured HH at all. :((


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