Planet Rugby Forum

flashman

When all else fails
Use 6 inch nails!

flashman

I live in Norbury and know the Family of the shooter by sight as used to attend same Church . Big Catholic family,who live in Pollards Hill. Apparently he attended John Fisher school in Croydon, was on Autistic spectrum but brilliant at Maths. He did Mechanical Engineering at U.C.L but dropped out a...

flashman

Sean Bean. " 'Ee Moneypenny, Mek us a Cuppa,Theres a good Lass! ( Smacks her on Arse) Walks into Posh Hotel up to Bar. " Ah M'sieu Bond, Dry Martini, Shaken not Stirred?" " Shekken!, What dost tha mean Shekken?, I,ll have a Pint of Bloody Tetleys, and mek sure tha puts a proper fookin head o'nt!" He...

flashman

What is it with this wretched stuff? Growing up ,I remember my Dad Boiling it,dousing it in Malt Vinegar and you ate it with Bread and Cheese. Rank horrid smell. Used to soak the Dried Pulp in Water and mix it with Horse feed to give to horses that had bad dose of colic. Then Blissfull Decades when ...

flashman

Gym Monkeys, Meh!
Farm Boys or Scaffolders would eat them for Breakfast!

flashman

Reminds me of the punchline to my favourite
Red Indian joke.
" Enough of your foolish questions,Two Dogs Fcuking!"

flashman

Looking at the colour of the water,It looks like it will silt up in 20 years.

flashman

There is a long history of Reggae artists doing covers of Country Music hits, many of which, I think are better than the original versions. Here are some of my favourites, Enjoy! Busy Signal. The Gambler ( Kenny Rogers) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=igZgDrBT5lE Toots and The Maytals. Country Roads...

flashman

Does anyone know of a site that I can log into so that I can find out the correct opinions to have today and whom I am supposed to condemn?
It's getting really hard to keep up!

flashman

Here is another ensemble piece from his Road show,
" Children go where I send thee" https://youtu.be/aQMT80D9nzU
He liked to include a lot of Call and Response Gospel numbers to get the crowd going.
Have a listen, there are some great In Car Karaoke numbers there,.

flashman

Les Dawson with Roy Barraclough as Cissy and Ada, are still one of the funniest things I have ever seen. About 20 years ago , I had done a job in Brixton for this Black Bloke and had arranged to pop by that evening to pick up some money. I stopped for a cup of tea and a chat, and he switched the tel...

flashman

Duet with Ray Charles, " Why Me, Lord" https://youtu.be/HWnPXfgNEC0

Here with Jerry Lee Lewis, Carl Perkins, Roy Orbison, " This Train is Bound For Glory"
https://youtu.be/KKsDQaTkkxo

All these boys could sing Gospel as naturally as breathing as well as the Devils music!!

flashman

Morellis in Broadstairs in Kent, top marks from
My teenage daughters!

flashman

So all us Builder types are back to work post Covid, and all of a sudden, there is a Plaster shortage. Bog Rolls, Pasta, that is history, a 25 kg bag of Bonding or Multifinish that is normally about a Fiver a bag is £30 to £ 40 if you can get it! People selling half bags on Ebay. Certainly can't aff...

flashman

Am spending a Sunday afternoon ,with the family watching the Godfather trilogy, although we may not bother with number 3, as Sophia Coppolla has as much talent as a tree. My two daughters insist that if Appollina had not been blown up and Michael had brought her to America Then things would have pan...

flashman

At the Catholic Primary School that I attended As a kid, the only terrifying bullies that I recall were the Nuns.Long Black habits and White head Dresses wielding Bamboo canes. My best one was at the age of 6 ,being persuaded into a Pretend fight with my best mate, the plan being When the Nun on Pla...

flashman

Outdoor Fcuking starts today.
If , of course, when it do rain,
Then we fcuks indoors again!

flashman

Get a Henry, every Office in the country is cleaned with them.

flashman

Am going to build a Brick Pizza oven/ Barbecue at the bottom of my garden I have a few thousand Stock bricks in my lock up that I have accumulated over the Years. I plan on using Engineering Bricks for the inside and base of oven. Should be ok for a few times a year. Going to dig out the footings to...

flashman

Thanks to everyone for reading, I just thought that the story should be out there,as a lot of these anecdotes just stay in familys and gradually get lost. Most of this generation would not talk about what they had been through,they just wanted to forget,and get on with life. One of my mates of my ag...

flashman

My dad was a Sergeant Major in the Parachute Regiment and was captured after Arnhem. We know from his records, that he was in several POW camps and ended up in Austria in a place called Kundle in the Spring of 1945. Forget all the films that you have seen, other ranks worked or starved, they were no...

flashman

I have a Van for my business ,(Roofing Contractor) which is on a monthly Lease Purchase deal. I got it for two reasons,Sadiq Khans ULEZ scheme and for tax efficiency ,( Told to by Accountant) Before the Lockdown , I had just started a job, scaffold up and all materials on site , so coffers a bit dep...

flashman

A truly great singer!
Can I recommend a reggae cover of " The Gambler"
by a chap called Busy Signal which you can find on Youtube.
I went down a bit of a Rabbit Hole the other week of
listening to Reggae Country music covers.
This is one of the best.

flashman

This has to be the ultimate benchmark,
If he survives ,we are all good,
If he turns his toes up ,then we are knackered !

flashman

Ok, who would win the battle of the Cads?
David Niven versus Terry Thomas?

flashman

David Niven, probably one of Hollywoods most prolific Shaggers!
Helps if you are Handsome ,Charming and have a Pencil Moustache!
As the saying goes, you would not trust him with " Your Maid, Your Malt or Your Money!"
Other than that, Top Bloke!

flashman

Because he thought all PROPER TEA was theft!!!

flashman

Karl Marx only drank Herbal Tea!

flashman

Most of the Scaffolders that I know, blokes who chuck around tons of steel every working day of their lives are of a fairly normal size. In my roofing business over the years, the strongest lads I have employed have been Maoris or Farm boys. In my experience , in at least 50% of Gym Monkey types, es...

flashman

Readers Wives,Pah!
We had to make do with the Corsetry section
in the Littlewoods catalogue!

flashman

Women with proper " Terry Waites Allotment"
muffs!

flashman

Great for budget funerals.
They do a self assembly coffin called Snüfftitt!

flashman

My youngest daughter had a schoolfriend round at the weekend and they were doing their Statistics homework together. Naively, I thought, " I can help here!" , as about 40 odd years ago I obtained an 'O 'level in Maths and Statistics, a Grade A no less. ( Pre Marijuana Days , Obviously!) I could not ...

flashman

I always thought that the correct response was,
" The reason that I am fat, is that every time I fcuk your wife, she gives me a biscuit!"

flashman

In the early 1980,s when I first started going into London Pubs, if you were hungry, you had a choice of Crisps, Nuts or a Pickled Egg and that was it. You normally waited till closing time to briefly rent a Doner Kebab on your way home. With Spoons, you can get a Hot meal and a Pint for less than a...

flashman

Friday at my local Wetherspoons is rammed!
Fish and Chips and Mushy Peas and a Pint of Guiness for £7.00 and top quality.
Struggling to see a down side TBH.

flashman

As you can guess, I discovered the books as a teenager and found a role model, Have re read them every few years since! He is a great yarn spinner and has the knack of making the preposterous sound true, then you discover that it actually is! His only competitor is Patrick O'Brian who is a bit more ...

flashman

Apparently we will get a massive fine from Europe if we don't appoint a Commissioner quickly, So who do you think Boris should nominate? Here is my shortlist. 1. Noddy Holder .( only if he wears his mirrored Top Hat !) 2.Grayson Perry 3. Gavin Henson 4. Gazza. Need some women ,but can't think of any...

flashman

Just checked out the Webcam and the weather forecast for my favourite ski resort, Passo Tonale in the Italian Alps.
1.5m of snow last week and another metre or so in the next few days>
Damn this Global Warming!

flashman

David Flatman is commentating live from the Final,
You are back in England, live from The Box Park in Croydon.
Worse than being sent to Siberia.
I think we should be told!!

Search found 327 matches