Poo - Page 2

Fangle · Post by **Fangle** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 2:30 pm

It happens.

And in that frame, I turn 73 today.

henry · Post by **henry** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 2:35 pm

Many happy returns, Fangle.

<legs it toilet/new home>

happyhooker · Post by **happyhooker** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 2:39 pm

Fangle wrote:It happens.

And in that frame, I turn 73 today.

Nice thread to announce that

Many happy returns

SilverGrin · Post by **SilverGrin** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 2:55 pm

Have some immodium.

It's not the endless liquid shit that I hate, but the chafed, raw starfish from all the wiping.

henry · Post by **henry** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 2:56 pm

SilverGrin wrote:Have some immodium.

It's not the endless liquid shit that I hate, but the chafed, raw starfish from all the wiping.

Less wiping and more hosing at this point.

SilverGrin · Post by **SilverGrin** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 3:10 pm

henry wrote:
SilverGrin wrote:Have some immodium.

It's not the endless liquid shit that I hate, but the chafed, raw starfish from all the wiping.
Less wiping and more hosing at this point.

Some cheese might help bind you up.

Eat a bunch of licorice is an old tale I recall. Although it could be the other way around and a cure for constipation. Better Google that one.

I've been baked all year so my advice probably isn't on point.

henry · Post by **henry** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 3:13 pm

globus · Post by **globus** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 3:18 pm

Fangle wrote:It happens.

And in that frame, I turn 73 today.

Zimmer? (Happy Birthday.)

Sefton · Post by **Sefton** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 3:24 pm

Fangle wrote:It happens.

And in that frame, I turn 73 today.

All the best, old friend.

argus · Post by **argus** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 3:50 pm

SilverGrin wrote:Have some immodium.

It's not the endless liquid shit that I hate, but the chafed, raw starfish from all the wiping.

Rather prune juice to get all the terms out

Henry should be in a reality TV show

argus · Post by **argus** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 3:51 pm

Fangle wrote:It happens.

And in that frame, I turn 73 today.

HB tangle

I'll set off some fireworks tonight in celebration

redderneck · Post by **redderneck** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 4:04 pm

It's at times ime this you're glad your old Mum/Auntie Mary/ some elderly relative who moved into their house in the late 70s / early 80's is still alive. Off you head for an extended visit.

Their bathrooms bound to have a bidet.

Occupy and improvise.

The Man Without Fear · Sat Dec 31, 2016 4:07 pm

Sefton wrote:I would like to say that I'm sympathetic, I really would.

I sense there's a "but" coming.

fisgard792 · Post by **fisgard792** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 4:08 pm

coca-cola

great when you feel sh1t,

sh1t when you feel great

globus · Post by **globus** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 4:17 pm

fisgard792 wrote:coca-cola

great when you feel sh1t,

sh1t when you feel great

Not a bad idea. My stepdaughter got very knee wobbly once. She was off to the States the next day.

Piled her full of flat coke as she lay in a distraught position on the sofa. Never seen a lady so pale.

She got there, courtesy of a miracle.

She went teetotal for a while, but now will drink the occasional glass of wine (or two).

Keith · Post by **Keith** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 4:18 pm

c69 wrote:So henry isn't full of shit atm.

Yet it still protrudes from his orifaeces.

Fangle · Post by **Fangle** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 4:51 pm

happyhooker wrote:
Fangle wrote:It happens.

And in that frame, I turn 73 today.
Nice thread to announce that

Many happy returns

Thanks to all. I put it on this thread because it is crappy to be getting old.

globus · Post by **globus** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 4:57 pm

Fangle wrote:
happyhooker wrote:
Fangle wrote:It happens.

And in that frame, I turn 73 today.
Nice thread to announce that

Many happy returns
Thanks to all. I put it on this thread because it is crappy to be getting old.

You are still about to have a go at me!

I think I'm the third eldest member of the club. OB is up there 1st. Who are the other wrinklies?

ScarfaceClaw · Post by **ScarfaceClaw** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 5:33 pm

Fangle wrote:It happens.

And in that frame, I turn 73 today.

Happy birthday Fangle.

ScarfaceClaw · Post by **ScarfaceClaw** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 5:34 pm

The Man Without Fear wrote:
Sefton wrote:I would like to say that I'm sympathetic, I really would.
I sense there's a "but" coming.

From the earlier posts, I say that butt is Henry's.

henry · Post by **henry** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 5:35 pm

Going to be quite the New Year.

Glued to a lavatory.

sorCrer · Post by **sorCrer** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 5:35 pm

HB Fangle. That's a decent innings. You'll need to bat on a bit.

Fangle · Post by **Fangle** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 6:00 pm

sorCrer wrote:HB Fangle. That's a decent innings. You'll need to bat on a bit.

Thanks to you and others. I unfortunately won't be able to see Argus's fire works from here. My innings should be a long way from over as both my parents got to be over 90 and my Mother over 100. Also Rinkly can verify that am in no way decrepit.

paddyor · Post by **paddyor** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 6:10 pm

Immodium and a course of after biotics.

happyhooker · Post by **happyhooker** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 6:20 pm

paddyor wrote:Immodium and a course of after biotics.

You what now??

Hellraiser · Post by **Hellraiser** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 6:25 pm

Edit: Whoops, thought this was the Leinster v Ulster match thread.

argus · Post by **argus** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 7:00 pm

Fangle wrote:
sorCrer wrote:HB Fangle. That's a decent innings. You'll need to bat on a bit.
Thanks to you and others. I unfortunately won't be able to see Argus's fire works from here. My innings should be a long way from over as both my parents got to be over 90 and my Mother over 100. Also Rinkly can verify that am in no way decrepit.

I doing the fireworks at midnight

paddyor · Post by **paddyor** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 7:33 pm

happyhooker wrote:
paddyor wrote:Immodium and a course of after biotics.
You what now??

Immodium will slow things down. After biotics will put some bacteria back in his digestive tract. The runs tend to clear it out.

henry · Post by **henry** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 8:24 pm

I've decided on gin.

sorCrer · Post by **sorCrer** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 8:31 pm

henry wrote:I've decided on gin.

Drank a bottle of Bombay Dry 2 nights ago. I'm posting this from the shitter.

Short Man Syndrome · Post by **Short Man Syndrome** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 8:40 pm

Eggs: protein will solidify things very effectively.

Someone cook the man some eggs.

HB Fangle. I share a birthday with Sefton, so I let him take all the fanboi abuse on here.

Ha! "Let". I kill me.

henry · Post by **henry** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 9:04 pm

sorCrer wrote:
henry wrote:I've decided on gin.
Drank a bottle of Bombay Dry 2 nights ago. I'm posting this from the shitter.

Got the same. Slice of grapefruit. Golf ball-sized ice cube. Some fever tree. Stomach is reacting. Trying to get so pissed I can't work out if it's favourably or not.

sorCrer · Post by **sorCrer** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 9:15 pm

henry wrote:
sorCrer wrote:
henry wrote:I've decided on gin.
Drank a bottle of Bombay Dry 2 nights ago. I'm posting this from the shitter.
Got the same. Slice of grapefruit. Golf ball-sized ice cube. Some fever tree. Stomach is reacting. Trying to get so pissed I can't work out if it's favourably or not.

Sounds excellent. My trots have abated temporarily but i feel your liquidity. DO NOT go near immodium. Will bung you up so tight you'll barely be able to fart. 36 hours later you'll be back on the dysentry.

globus · Post by **globus** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 9:20 pm

Fangle wrote:
sorCrer wrote:HB Fangle. That's a decent innings. You'll need to bat on a bit.
Thanks to you and others. I unfortunately won't be able to see Argus's fire works from here. My innings should be a long way from over as both my parents got to be over 90 and my Mother over 100. Also Rinkly can verify that am in no way decrepit.

Can we trust him?

sorCrer · Post by **sorCrer** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 9:48 pm

globus wrote:
Fangle wrote:
sorCrer wrote:HB Fangle. That's a decent innings. You'll need to bat on a bit.
Thanks to you and others. I unfortunately won't be able to see Argus's fire works from here. My innings should be a long way from over as both my parents got to be over 90 and my Mother over 100. Also Rinkly can verify that am in no way decrepit.
Can we trust him?

Met him a couple of times. He is trustworthy.

mr bungle · Post by **mr bungle** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 9:52 pm

SilverGrin wrote:Have some immodium.

It's not the endless liquid shit that I hate, but the chafed, raw starfish from all the wiping.

Fold toilet paper and store in the freezer prior to use. Superb for relieving ring sting.

Salient · Post by **Salient** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 11:09 pm

mr bungle wrote:
SilverGrin wrote:Have some immodium.

It's not the endless liquid shit that I hate, but the chafed, raw starfish from all the wiping.
Fold toilet paper and store in the freezer prior to use. Superb for relieving ring sting.

I'm just envisaging a whole container of folded toilet paper on permanent duty in your freezer, weird image.

Best regards to Fangle for the day

Would back the cheese call for the OP

guy smiley · Post by **guy smiley** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 11:26 pm

Happy Birthday Fangle!

Henry, pardon the obvious but you're in the shit here mate... the runs for this long is a Very Bad Thing. You'll be dehydrating badly, it sounds like drinking water is probably going straight through...

you'll need some sort of medical intervention to get it under control or you'll be in serious strife. I suffered similar years ago... family GP did a house call and took great delight in providing a prescription so my girlfriend could pick up a nice, large suppository to treat the problem from 'the other side'.

Kinky times, my friend. Kinky times.

comets · Post by **comets** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 11:48 pm

c69 wrote:So henry isn't full of shit atm.

Just Ali's Choice

mr bungle · Post by **mr bungle** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 11:59 pm

Salient wrote:
mr bungle wrote:
SilverGrin wrote:Have some immodium.

It's not the endless liquid shit that I hate, but the chafed, raw starfish from all the wiping.
Fold toilet paper and store in the freezer prior to use. Superb for relieving ring sting.
I'm just envisaging a whole container of folded toilet paper on permanent duty in your freezer, weird image.

just 20mins or so is required.