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Re: Height
Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2017 1:11 pm
by backrow
happyhooker wrote:The word midget isn't really acceptable nowadays globby, careful with that
And yes, I realise what I've opened myself up to there
Nah, you are modest and almost never open yourself up to a gag, last one was the getting on my horse / presume a Shetland pony - gag
To which you returned serve beautifully and won the point
Globus sheer volume of words opens himself up way more
Getting back to the OP I suppose a very tall woman would mean I would have to aim higher if I was to
Hit the tartan pyjamas
Re: Height
Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2017 1:13 pm
by danny_fitz
globus wrote:blindcider wrote:globus wrote:What do they put in ladies' shoes these days. Compost?
Sounds like a question for Yeeb
Let's ask him.
I've just met a lady who is a midget, so it works both ways. Wonderful character. Full of fun.
People are not just what they look like. I've found an unlikely keyboard player.
Who would have thought it?
Women seem to be relaxed if you have a dog in tow. Why is that?
I doubt she would ever have spoken to me unless I had the hound attached.
There is curious part of me that would like to see the 'Globus Tribute Band' in action, if only to see you butcher a few prog rock 70s classics while barging other band members out the way when they appear to be getting too much attention and your rambling monologues between songs. A dwarf keyboard player standing on a stool complete with howling dog in the background just completes the unholy mess.
Re: Height
Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2017 1:13 pm
by HighKingLeinster
happyhooker wrote:HighKingLeinster wrote:Yes I believe they prefer the term "short-arse" now.
Why is midget unacceptable these days anyway?
Not a fecking clue, just saw someone go off on one about it recently.
Similarly I got taken to task for describing someone as oriental the other day, didn't know that was out of bounds nowadays!
Was it a midget who went off on one? If so then who gives a fudge- just hit them with one of these
Re: Height
Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2017 1:35 pm
by globus
I'm pleased with the input from you bunch of scallywags.
Got a very awkward meeting tonight. Looks like a bun-fight.
Learned a new few terms from Pevsner.
It's all go here. I think some need a kick up the botty. I'll deliver it.
Present your rear-ends. I have a boot that can send a carefully crafted quenelle up it.
Re: Height
Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2017 3:14 pm
by Lorthern Nights
Re: Height
Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2017 3:25 pm
by sewa
pieman99 wrote:My first wife was taller than her.
I put my trousers on, have a cup of tea and I think about leaving the house
Am at work in bits here, all looking at me in the office wondering wtf
Re: Height
Posted: Sat Sep 09, 2017 12:10 am
by backrow
Bump for hose that don't get the park life thing - I did a remix on page 1
Re: Height
Posted: Sat Sep 09, 2017 1:38 am
by Razor
DragsterDriver wrote:How tall is she? Would she proportionally have a looser vagina?
Go on YouTube and watch Blur Parklife.
She probably has to constantly ask if it's... in yet.
Re: Height
Posted: Sat Sep 09, 2017 1:51 am
by MungoMan
Razor wrote:DragsterDriver wrote:How tall is she? Would she proportionally have a looser vagina?
Go on YouTube and watch Blur Parklife.
She probably has to constantly ask if it's... in yet.
By christ this thread has taken a walk on the vile side
Re: Height
Posted: Sat Sep 09, 2017 12:59 pm
by globus
Re: Height
Posted: Sat Sep 09, 2017 1:12 pm
by pjm1
Her legs are so long she's f**ked the margins
Re: Height
Posted: Sat Sep 09, 2017 1:19 pm
by globus
pjm1 wrote:Her legs are so long she's f**ked the margins
That's why I've spoilered it!
Re: Height
Posted: Sat Sep 09, 2017 1:24 pm
by globus
Re: Height
Posted: Sat Sep 09, 2017 1:38 pm
by cubby boi
backrow wrote:globus wrote:But what does it mean?
1. Parklife
Globus remix
Confidence is a preference for the habitual bullshitter of what is known as
(Parklife)
And morning crossword can be avoided if you take a route straight through what is known as
(Parklife)
The Management gave me brewer's droop, She intimidates me by the dirty pigeons, they love a bit of her
(Parklife)
Who's that gut lord marching (they gave me a Salute), you should cut down on your porklife mate, get some exercise
All the Famous people
So many Famous people
And they all go hand-in-hand
Hand-in-hand through their parklife
Know what I mean?
I get up when I want except on Wednesdays when I get rudely awakened by the need to Post on the Forum
(Parklife)
I put my trousers on, have a cup of tea and I think about performing emergency Cranial Surgery
(Parklife)
I feed the Kiddywinks, I sometimes feed the grand-kiddywinks too
It gives me a sense of enormous well-being
(Parklife)
And then I'm happy for the rest of the day safe in the knowledge there will always be a bit of my Wallet devoted to it
All the Famous people
So many Famous people
And they all go hand-in-hand
Hand-in-hand through their parklife
Parklife
(Parklife)
Parklife
(Parklife)
It's got nothing to do with Vorsprung durch technique, you know? Should have bought a Ford Kuga tbf
(Parklife)
(Parklife) and it's not about you joggers who go round and round and round Oundle (parklife)
(Parklife)
All the Famous people
So many Famous people
And they all go hand-in-hand
Hand-in-hand through their parklife
All the Famous people
So many Famous people
And they all go hand-in-hand
Hand-in-hand through their parklife
Re: Height
Posted: Sat Sep 09, 2017 3:01 pm
by Keith
Re: Height
Posted: Sat Sep 09, 2017 3:07 pm
by globus
Re: Height
Posted: Sat Sep 09, 2017 3:11 pm
by jdogscoop
Re: Height
Posted: Sat Sep 09, 2017 6:39 pm
by Rowdy
globus wrote:Is it important to be taller than your partner? Could you marry Karlie Kloss?
Marry? Maybe. Anything else? My God yes.
Re: Height
Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2017 12:16 am
by Mog The Almighty
I have a massive fetish for tall girls. Current girlfriend is about 5'10 and Id happily go with a girl up to 7 inches taller than me (that would make her 6'6 - 6'7) if she was hot.
Absolutely could not give two knobs of sheep shit if my girl was taller than me.
As a younger man I had a massive crush on Aussie basketball player Trish Fallon (~6'4)
Re: Height
Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2017 12:42 am
by happyhooker
Mog The Almighty wrote:I have a massive fetish for tall girls. Current girlfriend is about 5'10 and Id happily go with a girl up to 7 inches taller than me (that would make her 6'6 - 6'7) if she was hot.
Absolutely could not give two knobs of sheep shit if my girl was taller than me.
As a younger man I had a massive crush on Aussie basketball player Trish Fallon (~6'4)
I took my girlfriend's colleague to lords the other day for a 20/20 game. She's 6'5", slim and stunning. You'd love her.
The amount of weirded out MCC members staring at us was hysterical. (I'm 5'6" if you're being generous, not fat, but weigh more than her). One old bugger tripped over his own walking stick.
Re: Height
Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2017 6:05 pm
by Mog The Almighty
happyhooker wrote:Mog The Almighty wrote:I have a massive fetish for tall girls. Current girlfriend is about 5'10 and Id happily go with a girl up to 7 inches taller than me (that would make her 6'6 - 6'7) if she was hot.
Absolutely could not give two knobs of sheep shit if my girl was taller than me.
As a younger man I had a massive crush on Aussie basketball player Trish Fallon (~6'4)
I took my girlfriend's colleague to lords the other day for a 20/20 game. She's 6'5", slim and stunning. You'd love her.
The amount of weirded out MCC members staring at us was hysterical. (I'm 5'6" if you're being generous, not fat, but weigh more than her). One old bugger tripped over his own walking stick.
There's rules on this forum. In particular a first rule.
Re: Height
Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2017 6:12 pm
by globus
Mog The Almighty wrote:happyhooker wrote:Mog The Almighty wrote:I have a massive fetish for tall girls. Current girlfriend is about 5'10 and Id happily go with a girl up to 7 inches taller than me (that would make her 6'6 - 6'7) if she was hot.
Absolutely could not give two knobs of sheep shit if my girl was taller than me.
As a younger man I had a massive crush on Aussie basketball player Trish Fallon (~6'4)
I took my girlfriend's colleague to lords the other day for a 20/20 game. She's 6'5", slim and stunning. You'd love her.
The amount of weirded out MCC members staring at us was hysterical. (I'm 5'6" if you're being generous, not fat, but weigh more than her). One old bugger tripped over his own walking stick.
There's rules on this forum. In particular a first rule.[/ote]
I posted her. So shut up.
Re: Height
Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2017 6:25 pm
by happyhooker
Mog The Almighty wrote:happyhooker wrote:Mog The Almighty wrote:I have a massive fetish for tall girls. Current girlfriend is about 5'10 and Id happily go with a girl up to 7 inches taller than me (that would make her 6'6 - 6'7) if she was hot.
Absolutely could not give two knobs of sheep shit if my girl was taller than me.
As a younger man I had a massive crush on Aussie basketball player Trish Fallon (~6'4)
I took my girlfriend's colleague to lords the other day for a 20/20 game. She's 6'5", slim and stunning. You'd love her.
The amount of weirded out MCC members staring at us was hysterical. (I'm 5'6" if you're being generous, not fat, but weigh more than her). One old bugger tripped over his own walking stick.
There's rules on this forum. In particular a first rule.
"Hi darling, could you get me a picture of X from your office so I can post it on that rugby message bored that despite, or maybe because, you know several posters on it, you think is a weird place"
Ummmm, let me mull that over a minute.
And globby, what the hell are you wibbling on about?
Re: Height
Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2017 6:34 pm
by backrow
5'6" !
In the Cubans perhaps
Re: Height
Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2017 6:40 pm
by backrow
Must say a six five attractive woman would be a sight to behold, I've never seen a woman over six foot that wasn't a behemoth or olive oils uglier taller sister.
Plenty is stunning 5'11"'s out there but once past that they get all goofy and gangly and Devin Toner.
Re: Height
Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2017 7:37 pm
by happyhooker
backrow wrote:5'6" !
In the Cubans perhaps
You'll have noticed my 'generous' comment
Re: Height
Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2017 7:51 pm
by backrow
happyhooker wrote:backrow wrote:5'6" !
In the Cubans perhaps
You'll have noticed my 'generous' comment
Not even Globus is that generous !
Re: Height
Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 10:00 am
by globus
backrow wrote:happyhooker wrote:backrow wrote:5'6" !
In the Cubans perhaps
You'll have noticed my 'generous' comment
Not even Globus is that generous !
I'm extremely generous!
Are the "Cubans" shoes? They still wear them in Sleaford!
Re: Height
Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 10:05 am
by Ouch_I'M_Ill
Im tall but my lolck (cock ) isnt.
I like short women. Tall women are yucky and their pussy smells like fish
Re: Height
Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 11:23 am
by Frodder
Ouch_I'M_Ill wrote:Im tall but my lolck (cock ) isnt.
I like short women. Tall women are yucky and their pussy smells like fish
Well there's an interesting spin on the thread there.....
Re: Height
Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 11:30 am
by backrow
Frodder wrote:Ouch_I'M_Ill wrote:Im tall but my lolck (cock ) isnt.
I like short women. Tall women are yucky and their pussy smells like fish
Well there's an interesting spin on the thread there.....
yeah, I've never understood this 'smells of fish' thing
it doesn't
maybe I've just been very lucky and always pulled women of impeccable taste , cleanliness, and Hygiene. Somehow I doubt that..
Re: Height
Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 11:41 am
by globus
Never got this "fishy smell" thing. A bit of preparation is required, involving a lovely shower with a pretty woman.
Soap is useful.
Re: Height
Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 11:51 am
by backrow
globus wrote:Never got this "fishy smell" thing. A bit of preparation is required, involving a lovely shower with a pretty woman.
Soap is useful.
so you always bathe them before conquest ? you don't just go in for the Exhaust port and enjoy the Disco Fuzz ?
Re: Height
Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 11:59 am
by SaintK
Is 6'9" tall enough?
Re: Height
Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 12:00 pm
by globus
backrow wrote:globus wrote:Never got this "fishy smell" thing. A bit of preparation is required, involving a lovely shower with a pretty woman.
Soap is useful.
so you always bathe them before conquest ? you don't just go in for the Exhaust port and enjoy the Disco Fuzz ?
Conquest? Oh no. I've never been known to battle. Took me a while to work this out.
I was covered in oil under a car and three ladies turned up. One was my tennis partner. I'd taken her dad to Ely to have a hip done.
What is it with women and oil?
The rest is history.
Re: Height
Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 12:08 pm
by RuggaBugga
globus wrote:Never got this "fishy smell" thing. A bit of preparation is required, involving a lovely shower with a pretty woman.
Soap is useful.
They don't actually put soap up there you know... and then there's the whole getting wet thing.
Mind you, five minutes of you prattling on and any woman would be drier than Gandhi's flip flop.
Re: Height
Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 12:13 pm
by backrow
RuggaBugga wrote:globus wrote:Never got this "fishy smell" thing. A bit of preparation is required, involving a lovely shower with a pretty woman.
Soap is useful.
They don't actually put soap up there you know... and then there's the whole getting wet thing.
Mind you, five minutes of you prattling on and any woman would be drier than Gandhi's flip flop.
depends where his mouth & lips are whilst he's giving one of these highly plausible anecdotes !
Globus
"So, I built the lifts in the Sears tower in '88 *nosh nosh nosh*
Management
oooh yeah OMG
Globus "the Head *nosh* of security there, Jeff *nosh* mcginty, took me *nosh* out for a pint of shampoo at the *nosh* Boars head * nose*
Management
*squirt*
etc
Re: Height
Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 12:15 pm
by globus
RuggaBugga wrote:globus wrote:Never got this "fishy smell" thing. A bit of preparation is required, involving a lovely shower with a pretty woman.
Soap is useful.
They don't actually put soap up there you know... and then there's the whole getting wet thing.
Mind you, five minutes of you prattling on and any woman would be drier than Gandhi's flip flop.
I've done ok thanks. And I am probably more interesting to women than you are.
Re: Height
Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 12:17 pm
by globus
backrow wrote:RuggaBugga wrote:globus wrote:Never got this "fishy smell" thing. A bit of preparation is required, involving a lovely shower with a pretty woman.
Soap is useful.
They don't actually put soap up there you know... and then there's the whole getting wet thing.
Mind you, five minutes of you prattling on and any woman would be drier than Gandhi's flip flop.
depends where his mouth & lips are whilst he's giving one of these highly plausible anecdotes !
Globus
"So, I built the lifts in the Sears tower in '88 *nosh nosh nosh*
Management
oooh yeah OMG
Globus "the Head *nosh* of security there, Jeff *nosh* mcginty, took me *nosh* out for a pint of shampoo at the *nosh* Boars head * nose*
Management
*squirt*
etc
I have no idea what you are rambling on about. Take forty winks.
Re: Height
Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 12:22 pm
by RuggaBugga
globus wrote:RuggaBugga wrote:globus wrote:Never got this "fishy smell" thing. A bit of preparation is required, involving a lovely shower with a pretty woman.
Soap is useful.
They don't actually put soap up there you know... and then there's the whole getting wet thing.
Mind you, five minutes of you prattling on and any woman would be drier than Gandhi's flip flop.
I've done ok thanks. And I am probably more interesting to women than you are.
You remind me of the Dad in the M. Night Shym-aliens episode of Rick and Morty.
