Re: Height
Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2017 3:35 pm
"I feed the Kiddywinks, I sometimes feed the grand-kiddywinks too"
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Well with a few tweaks we get.backrow wrote:I didn't know parklife jokes had been made about him before until I browsed his recent posts to be fair - seems samshark invented this.
In the country lyrics can stay pretty much as they are tbf
Northamptonshire dweller, successful fella
Thought to himself oops I've got a lot of money
I'm on a full final salary (defined benefit)
I'm a professional fantasist but my heart's not in it
I'm paying the price of fibbing at the limit
Caught up in the centuries of lies
It preys on him, that attention is getting thin
He lives in a house, a very big house in the country
He’s been in the morgue at 2am sawing off heads in the country
He was a sailing instructor in the country
He can solve a rubiks cube in under 2 mins in the country
He lives in a house, a very big house in the country
He's owns a Velocette bike in the country
He writes gags for TV in the country
He takes the remembrance day salute in the country
In the country, in the country
Blow, blow me out I am so sad, on my Beneteau
Blow, blow me out I am so sad, my fibs are wasted on you
He lives in a house, a very big house in the country
He plays the guitar, sax and drums in the country
He did a mortgage for a police officer and his wife in the country
He ran up Mount Teide in the middle of the night in the country
He lives in a house, a very big house in the country
He's speaks fluent French in the country
He played to a very decent level as skipper in the country
He trained at the Ecole de Cuisine La Varenne in the country
danny_fitz wrote:Well with a few tweaks we get.backrow wrote:I didn't know parklife jokes had been made about him before until I browsed his recent posts to be fair - seems samshark invented this.
In the country lyrics can stay pretty much as they are tbf
Northamptonshire dweller, successful fella
Thought to himself oops I've got a lot of money
I'm on a full final salary (defined benefit)
I'm a professional fantasist but my heart's not in it
I'm paying the price of fibbing at the limit
Caught up in the centuries of lies
It preys on him, that attention is getting thin
He lives in a house, a very big house in the country
He’s been in the morgue at 2am sawing off heads in the country
He was a sailing instructor in the country
He can solve a rubiks cube in under 2 mins in the country
He lives in a house, a very big house in the country
He's owns a Velocette bike in the country
He writes gags for TV in the country
He takes the remembrance day salute in the country
In the country, in the country
Blow, blow me out I am so sad, on my Beneteau
Blow, blow me out I am so sad, my fibs are wasted on you
He lives in a house, a very big house in the country
He plays the guitar, sax and drums in the country
He did a mortgage for a police officer and his wife in the country
He ran up Mount Teide in the middle of the night in the country
He lives in a house, a very big house in the country
He's speaks fluent French in the country
He played to a very decent level as skipper in the country
He trained at the Ecole de Cuisine La Varenne in the country
No need to imagine there is a plethora of such photos out there.globus wrote:Imagine her in lingerie though.jdogscoop wrote:Horrendous gingham dress. 2/10 WNB
And videozt1903 wrote:No need to imagine there is a plethora of such photos out there.globus wrote:Imagine her in lingerie though.jdogscoop wrote:Horrendous gingham dress. 2/10 WNB
The one in wobbledom is farking massive thoughjdogscoop wrote:The funniest thing about it is that the councillor's house isn't very big at all, and it's certainly not in the country.
But it's not my family home, which I own. I'm here as the Management's children were at Oundle school when we got together and I wanted to ensure they were near their mum.jdogscoop wrote:The funniest thing about it is that the councillor's house isn't very big at all, and it's certainly not in the country.
The kiddiwinks live there in their own houses. They aren't massive at all.backrow wrote:The one in Wobbledom is farking massive thoughjdogscoop wrote:The funniest thing about it is that the councillor's house isn't very big at all, and it's certainly not in the country.
We are not interested, yet we hear about it all fairly often - hence the pasticheglobus wrote:The kiddiwinks live there in their own houses. They aren't massive at all.backrow wrote:The one in Wobbledom is farking massive thoughjdogscoop wrote:The funniest thing about it is that the councillor's house isn't very big at all, and it's certainly not in the country.
Why this interest in my domestic affairs?
So, in reverse order -globus wrote:I do funerals as well. So if you require my services just ask. Make sure I get your wishes in time.
No. You just want to trip me up. I have no problem with some ribbing; I do it enough myself.backrow wrote:We are not interested, yet we hear about it all fairly often - hence the pasticheglobus wrote:The kiddiwinks live there in their own houses. They aren't massive at all.backrow wrote:The one in Wobbledom is farking massive thoughjdogscoop wrote:The funniest thing about it is that the councillor's house isn't very big at all, and it's certainly not in the country.
Why this interest in my domestic affairs?
danny_fitz wrote:Well with a few tweaks we get.backrow wrote:I didn't know parklife jokes had been made about him before until I browsed his recent posts to be fair - seems samshark invented this.
In the country lyrics can stay pretty much as they are tbf
Northamptonshire dweller, successful fella
Thought to himself oops I've got a lot of money
I'm on a full final salary (defined benefit)
I'm a professional fantasist but my heart's not in it
I'm paying the price of fibbing at the limit
Caught up in the centuries of lies
It preys on him, that attention is getting thin
He lives in a house, a very big house in the country
He’s been in the morgue at 2am sawing off heads in the country
He was a sailing instructor in the country
He can solve a rubiks cube in under 2 mins in the country
He lives in a house, a very big house in the country
He's owns a Velocette bike in the country
He writes gags for TV in the country
He takes the remembrance day salute in the country
In the country, in the country
Blow, blow me out I am so sad, on my Beneteau
Blow, blow me out I am so sad, my fibs are wasted on you
He lives in a house, a very big house in the country
He plays the guitar, sax and drums in the country
He did a mortgage for a police officer and his wife in the country
He ran up Mount Teide in the middle of the night in the country
He lives in a house, a very big house in the country
He's speaks fluent French in the country
He played to a very decent level as skipper in the country
He trained at the Ecole de Cuisine La Varenne in the country
No.fatcat wrote:So, in reverse order -globus wrote:I do funerals as well. So if you require my services just ask. Make sure I get your wishes in time.
You operate the autopsy power tools
You arrange the funeral
You pronounce them dead
You feed, clothe and house them in adulthood
You see to their every whim in life in general (only meeeee!)
You design their wedding
Have you ever pushed a doctor aside and taken over delivering a baby?
A very expensive thoroughbred dog, his pal is a professional breeder, won Crufts several times, arranged a mortgage for him once and taught him to sail on the Solent, his wife is a former muse to David Hockney (he has several of his works)backrow wrote:No,
I don't want to trip you up , just joshing. Feels like I've pushed over an old run and run over his dog.
Sarah is actually a judge at Crufts, so not a "he". Their house is festooned with ribands.danny_fitz wrote:A very expensive thoroughbred dog, his pal is a professional breeder, won Crufts several times, arranged a mortgage for him once and taught him to sail on the Solent, his wife is a former muse to David Hockney (he has several of his works)backrow wrote:No,
I don't want to trip you up , just joshing. Feels like I've pushed over an old run and run over his dog.
Parklife
Parklifeglobus wrote:Sarah is actually a judge at Crufts, so not a "he". Their house is festooned with ribands.danny_fitz wrote:A very expensive thoroughbred dog, his pal is a professional breeder, won Crufts several times, arranged a mortgage for him once and taught him to sail on the Solent, his wife is a former muse to David Hockney (he has several of his works)backrow wrote:No,
I don't want to trip you up , just joshing. Feels like I've pushed over an old run and run over his dog.
Parklife
Her husband is/was a rugby player and is the nicest you can meet.
They sadly sold their house next to Sibson airfield (she had a plane) just up the road and moved into the Fens.
Her dog clipping skills are to be admired. Her husband likes a pint or two, but they stay over.
Nice one yeebbackrow wrote:1. Parklifeglobus wrote:But what does it mean?
Globus remix
Confidence is a preference for the habitual bullshitter of what is known as
(Parklife)
And morning crossword can be avoided if you take a route straight through what is known as
(Parklife)
The Management gave me brewer's droop, She intimidates me by the dirty pigeons, they love a bit of her
(Parklife)
Who's that gut lord marching (they gave me a Salute), you should cut down on your porklife mate, get some exercise
All the Famous people
So many Famous people
And they all go hand-in-hand
Hand-in-hand through their parklife
Know what I mean?
I get up when I want except on Wednesdays when I get rudely awakened by the need to Post on the Forum
(Parklife)
I put my trousers on, have a cup of tea and I think about performing emergency Cranial Surgery
(Parklife)
I feed the Kiddywinks, I sometimes feed the grand-kiddywinks too
It gives me a sense of enormous well-being
(Parklife)
And then I'm happy for the rest of the day safe in the knowledge there will always be a bit of my Wallet devoted to it
All the Famous people
So many Famous people
And they all go hand-in-hand
Hand-in-hand through their parklife
Parklife
(Parklife)
Parklife
(Parklife)
It's got nothing to do with Vorsprung durch technique, you know? Should have bought a Ford Kuga tbf
(Parklife)
(Parklife) and it's not about you joggers who go round and round and round Oundle (parklife)
(Parklife)
All the Famous people
So many Famous people
And they all go hand-in-hand
Hand-in-hand through their parklife
All the Famous people
So many Famous people
And they all go hand-in-hand
Hand-in-hand through their parklife
P in VG wrote:
I like it!. Very good.P in VG wrote:
Oh, do stop it with that humility that you're so good at. Sheeesh.globus wrote:Biggish fish in a small pond. Life quality excellent.
Getting a sackcloth shirt truly to abase myself. Drew the line at a barbed wire flail.spookly wrote:Oh, do stop it with that humility that you're so good at. Sheeesh.globus wrote:Biggish fish in a small pond. Life quality excellent.
#parklife
When I die I would like my eulogy to be about me though, I'm sure you understand.globus wrote:I like it!. Very good.P in VG wrote:
I tend not to do Catholic weddings though but you have caught the spirit.
The (funeral) one I did for a certain friend's dad has been regarded as a bit of a classic.
He was Head Porter at Oundle School and was famous for puffing on his pipe.
I also wrote his eulogy.
My services to anyone on here will be free. It keeps the brain going.
Globus, I've stated openly on here that you're a nice enough bloke but for fvck sakes don't call your children/grandchildren or any fvcking children, kiddywinks. That sort of shite belong's on Mumsnet.globus wrote:The kiddiwinks live there in their own houses. They aren't massive at all.backrow wrote:The one in Wobbledom is farking massive thoughjdogscoop wrote:The funniest thing about it is that the councillor's house isn't very big at all, and it's certainly not in the country.
Why this interest in my domestic affairs?
P in VG wrote:
Tell us more about this family home mansion.globus wrote:But it's not my family home, which I own. I'm here as the Management's children were at Oundle school when we got together and I wanted to ensure they were near their mum.jdogscoop wrote:The funniest thing about it is that the councillor's house isn't very big at all, and it's certainly not in the country.
So I moved here. We have no reason to live in a mansion now. Kiddiwinks have fled the coop and both are married and settled. I love it here. Biggish fish in a small pond. Life quality excellent.
Difficult bit is that the MIL might move here. Sheesh.
Not much point to being tall when you resemble a regular at the Mos Eisley Cantina.backrow wrote:I would marry the shit out of that tbh
She would be 3 inches shorter than me still
happyhooker wrote:No it isn't
Thank god