If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

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Mog The Almighty
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If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Mog The Almighty »

1) All cotton jerseys with collars (e.g. old school, or like Scotland's recent collared jerseys). Collars because it's a tradition and sign of a gentleman's game. Cotton to give players something to grip in scrums in mauls, rucks, etc.

2) Old school rucking is back in the game.

3) Sponsorship on all jerseys limited to a certain size, certain quantity and not center-front or center-back of the shirt.

4) Zero-tolerance crack-down to feeding scrums straight. Just like with line-outs.

5) You are only eligible to play for any International side if you are both a) a passport-holding citizen of that country and (not or) b) have been at some point in your life a resident of that country for a time of five years or more (so no getting passports on your great grandmother's side for a country you've never stepped foot in just to get a cap).

6) "Marto" never commentates another Australian game. He belongs in the stands with a scarf and a beer, not the commentary box.

7) All international games must be available on free-to-air TV in the country they are played-in, or the game is moved to a country to will comply.

8 ) No on-field sponsorship (i.e. no huge f'n signs in the grass) and definitely not those new ones that are being added with special effects. They look horrible. The field is starting to look like a motor-sport jacket. There's barely any green left. It's a disgrace.

BBB
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by BBB »

I'd bleed World Rugby of all its cash and siphon the money into Swiss bank accounts under the names of all my family members and close friends.

For a start.

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Jim Lahey
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Jim Lahey »

Take away on field TMO replays on the big screen. The crowd booing is influencing too many referrals that amount to nothing and slow the game down.

Allow fair contests for the ball in the air. That penalty against Kerevi on Falou was a joke.

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Floppykid
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Floppykid »

From your list, number 5 would be my number 1. Though I'd also ammend it to include players who havery parents from a different country and choose to represent said country.

Number 7 would be my number 2.

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Laurent
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Laurent »

Have loose head and tight head prop swap at every scrum.

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Floppykid
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Floppykid »

Reduce the 6 Nations to 5 teams.

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Mr. Very Popular
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Mr. Very Popular »

Only proper people who have played the game are allowed go to games.

No 'razzmatazz' before or during the game.

All good play will be applauded by all supporters

On the beer with opposition team and supporters must be participated in.

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waguser
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by waguser »

Laurent wrote:Have loose head and tight head prop swap at every scrum.


That's actually a fun one

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Uthikoloshe
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Uthikoloshe »

I'd get South Africa banned again for racial quotas.

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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Stjudes »

Laurent wrote:Have loose head and tight head prop swap at every scrum.


:lol: who was it again who asked that many moons ago?

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guy smiley
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by guy smiley »

Stjudes wrote:
Laurent wrote:Have loose head and tight head prop swap at every scrum.


:lol: who was it again who asked that many moons ago?



A man named Ikaponthus.

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The Native
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by The Native »

Mine would be only captains can speak to the referee and excessive appealing or remonstrating for a penalty will result in a penalty against for that very reason.

guy smiley wrote:
Stjudes wrote:
Laurent wrote:Have loose head and tight head prop swap at every scrum.


:lol: who was it again who asked that many moons ago?



A man named Ikaponthus.


Image

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guy smiley
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by guy smiley »

The Native wrote:Mine would be only captains can speak to the referee and excessive appealing or remonstrating for a penalty will result in a penalty against for that very reason.

guy smiley wrote:
Stjudes wrote:
Laurent wrote:Have loose head and tight head prop swap at every scrum.


:lol: who was it again who asked that many moons ago?



A man named Ikaponthus.


Image



Some say he had the arms of a hippopotamus and a waddle to match.

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The Native
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by The Native »

guy smiley wrote:
The Native wrote:Mine would be only captains can speak to the referee and excessive appealing or remonstrating for a penalty will result in a penalty against for that very reason.

guy smiley wrote:
Stjudes wrote:
Laurent wrote:Have loose head and tight head prop swap at every scrum.


:lol: who was it again who asked that many moons ago?



A man named Ikaponthus.


Image



Some say he had the arms of a hippopotamus and a waddle to match.

Though legend has it, his calves were the diameter of Staedtler HB.

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Hong Kong
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Hong Kong »

2) like your knowledge of TH/LH

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guy smiley
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by guy smiley »

The Native wrote:
guy smiley wrote:


Some say he had the arms of a hippopotamus and a waddle to match.

Though legend has it, his calves were the diameter of Staedtler HB.

He once made love to a Latvian fountain while single handedly anchoring the back row in a tight contest.

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danny_fitz
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by danny_fitz »

Stadium announcers to be forced to fight to the death as half time entertainment.

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guy smiley
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by guy smiley »

danny_fitz wrote:Stadium announcers to be forced to fight to the death as half time entertainment.


Pre game... f**k putting up with that crap for half a game. They can battle it out as the stands fill.

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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Gwenno »

Mr. Very Popular wrote:Only proper people who have played the game are allowed go to games.

No 'razzmatazz' before or during the game.

All good play will be applauded by all supporters

On the beer with opposition team and supporters must be participated in.

Getting up for a piss any time during play to be punished by buying a pint for all those inconvenienced by it.

Gwenno
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Gwenno »

What about ALL jumping for the ball, lifting in the line out to continue as legal but NO sanction for any sort of contact in the air? You can do it, but at your own risk, like tightrope walking.

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guy smiley
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by guy smiley »

oooohhh... tightrope walking!!



Let's have a designated 'touchdown rectangle' accessed only by tightrope from the tryline.

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Mog The Almighty
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Mog The Almighty »

Gwenno wrote:What about ALL jumping for the ball, lifting in the line out to continue as legal but NO sanction for any sort of contact in the air? You can do it, but at your own risk, like tightrope walking.


That's never going to fly. And I wouldn't want to see it either.

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Dork Lard
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Dork Lard »

Ooh, well there are many.

- The Uber-ref: he's a ref for the ref. He runs around the ref who runs around the players and assesses his decisions. The Uber-ref receives information from a team and is not allowed to verbally communicate with anyone on the field. He just takes decisions. His requirements are he needs to wear an overall and look like Rowan Atkinson. If the ref makes a horrible decision, he blows his whistle and hands him a penalty. If the ref really fks up or commits too many penalties or makes too many fancy jokes/is too cute, the uber-ref will send him to the sin-bin and he won't be allowed dessert for a week.

- Death penalty for faking a play: the simulations or exaggerations to get yellows or red are to be dealt with the death penalty. However, the player is to be executed 7 years from the incident, but randomly without notice on a remote date, and gets to choose the animal he is to be reincarnated into.

- Annual Anal Beads: whenever a club president or federation masterlord (the new official name given to fed directors) fails at mounting a successful team with his recruiting/assembling of coaching staff etc.., at the end of the year he gets the annual anal beads treatment. Rough rectal action, however in the relative privacy and silence of any public library of his choice. A system is established, looking at the capital/results ratio of the organization.

- Small Size Syndrome: again through a fair assessment system, when a headcoach (and staff) underperforms in relation to the talent at his disposal, he gets "sick with SSS". Small Size Syndrome. He's forced to wear Small size clothes, shoes, Small size everything... every day in public during the off-season. The phrase "hah, you look small today !" commonly used against them - to which a person is obligated to reply with "thank you Sir" while making eye contact - repeated throughout the day as a terribly condescending mocking gesture.

- Donkey x 3: donkey times three is the due punishment for stagnant players. Whenever potential is discerned but the individual's ability looks stale and lacks the necessary improvement after a season, he's given this award. The award takes place at the local Pizza Hut at 6am sharp, with everyone involved contractually obligated to order a stuffed-crust deep pan pizza. The winner of the award must travel publicly on the three donkeys (supplied by the fed) during the off-season on his way anywhere, or pay a fine of one window or door (irreplaceable under contract) from his residence; which are then generously offered to charity to ppl with drug addictions.

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Mog The Almighty
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Mog The Almighty »

Stjudes wrote:
Laurent wrote:Have loose head and tight head prop swap at every scrum.


:lol: who was it again who asked that many moons ago?


Christ it's getting worse! :blush:

Nobody ever said that. It's like Chinese whispers, but I guess after seven-odd years you'd expect that much. What I asked was if the TH and LH ever swap sides for tactical reasons. And even that was a silly question, which was embarrassing. But at the stage of my rugby playing career, the front row were just three fat arses in my face. However, since which I've actually been trained at loosehead and played front at a fairly decent level, which I suspect is a damn sight more knowledge than 95% of posters on this forum r.e. the front row. So you can all just stfu now thank you very much.

Speaking of which, and being dictator of rugby, it would be an interesting experiment to ban the second rowers binding under the props' legs, and ban the flankers from binding to the props with their "free" hand. The purpose being to force the front-row to support 100% of their own weight pre-engage, instead of having their feet way back and the second rowers/flankers holding them by pulling them back. This would result, I suspect, in scrums being packed higher and less collapsing. It would be worth a shot anyway. And I think it's exactly why there's not really many scrums collapsing at lower levels - because at lower levels, the props usually are just big fat guys from the pub who are supporting their own weight the whole time and never getting so low as a result.
Last edited by Mog The Almighty on Sun Apr 30, 2017 1:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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danthefan
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by danthefan »

Floppykid wrote:From your list, number 5 would be my number 1. Though I'd also ammend it to include players who havery parents from a different country and choose to represent said country.

Number 7 would be my number 2.


TV money is king, would cripple the international game.


As for the first point, you have to make provisions for guys like Marmion or Touhy, Irish parents and I guess considered himself Irish. Obviously have no issue with Marmion playing for us even though he's English. The grandparent thing should just be struck off immediately.

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Mog The Almighty
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Mog The Almighty »

danthefan wrote:
Floppykid wrote:From your list, number 5 would be my number 1. Though I'd also ammend it to include players who havery parents from a different country and choose to represent said country.

Number 7 would be my number 2.


TV money is king, would cripple the international game.


No it wouldn't. The International game was just fine even before the advent of professionalism. Before everything with packaged and sold.

It might mean there is slightly less money in the game, but the fatcats aren't doing anything too impressive with the money they have now, so fudge it.

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Diego
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Diego »

Mog The Almighty wrote:
Stjudes wrote:
Laurent wrote:Have loose head and tight head prop swap at every scrum.


:lol: who was it again who asked that many moons ago?


Christ it's getting worse! :blush:

Nobody ever said that. It's like Chinese whispers, but I guess after seven-odd years you'd expect that much. What I asked was if the TH and LH ever swap sides for tactical reasons. And even that was a silly question, which was embarrassing. But at the stage of my rugby playing career, the front row were just three fat arses in my face. However, since which I've actually been trained at loosehead and played front at a fairly decent level, which I suspect is a damn sight more knowledge than 95% of posters on this forum r.e. the front row. So you can all just stfu now thank you very much.

Speaking of which, and being dictator of rugby, it would be an interesting experiment to ban the second rowers binding under the props' legs, and ban the flankers from binding to the props with their "free" hand. The purpose being to force the front-row to support 100% of their own weight pre-engage, instead of having their feet way back and the second rowers/flankers holding them by pulling them back. This would result, I suspect, in scrums being packed higher and less collapsing. It would be worth a shot anyway. And I think it's exactly why there's not really many scrums collapsing at lower levels - because at lower levels, the props usually are just big fat guys from the pub who are supporting their own weight the whole time and never getting so low as a result.

:lol:

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Mog The Almighty
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Mog The Almighty »

:x

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guy smiley
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by guy smiley »

Diego wrote:
Mog The Almighty wrote:
Stjudes wrote:
Laurent wrote:Have loose head and tight head prop swap at every scrum.


:lol: who was it again who asked that many moons ago?


Christ it's getting worse! :blush:

Nobody ever said that. It's like Chinese whispers, but I guess after seven-odd years you'd expect that much. What I asked was if the TH and LH ever swap sides for tactical reasons. And even that was a silly question, which was embarrassing. But at the stage of my rugby playing career, the front row were just three fat arses in my face. However, since which I've actually been trained at loosehead and played front at a fairly decent level, which I suspect is a damn sight more knowledge than 95% of posters on this forum r.e. the front row. So you can all just stfu now thank you very much.

Speaking of which, and being dictator of rugby, it would be an interesting experiment to ban the second rowers binding under the props' legs, and ban the flankers from binding to the props with their "free" hand. The purpose being to force the front-row to support 100% of their own weight pre-engage, instead of having their feet way back and the second rowers/flankers holding them by pulling them back. This would result, I suspect, in scrums being packed higher and less collapsing. It would be worth a shot anyway. And I think it's exactly why there's not really many scrums collapsing at lower levels - because at lower levels, the props usually are just big fat guys from the pub who are supporting their own weight the whole time and never getting so low as a result.


:lol:


Imagine all of those posters who had no idea that Mog is the poster known as Ikaponthus?

Legend has it that his feet make a clippity clop noise when he sneaks into the house late at night.

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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by jolindien »

BBB wrote:I'd bleed World Rugby of all its cash and siphon the money into Swiss bank accounts under the names of all my family members and close friends.

For a start.


and someone made a mod of you... how clever.

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Mog The Almighty
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Mog The Almighty »

guy smiley wrote:
Diego wrote:
Mog The Almighty wrote:
Stjudes wrote:
Laurent wrote:Have loose head and tight head prop swap at every scrum.


:lol: who was it again who asked that many moons ago?


Christ it's getting worse! :blush:

Nobody ever said that. It's like Chinese whispers, but I guess after seven-odd years you'd expect that much. What I asked was if the TH and LH ever swap sides for tactical reasons. And even that was a silly question, which was embarrassing. But at the stage of my rugby playing career, the front row were just three fat arses in my face. However, since which I've actually been trained at loosehead and played front at a fairly decent level, which I suspect is a damn sight more knowledge than 95% of posters on this forum r.e. the front row. So you can all just stfu now thank you very much.

Speaking of which, and being dictator of rugby, it would be an interesting experiment to ban the second rowers binding under the props' legs, and ban the flankers from binding to the props with their "free" hand. The purpose being to force the front-row to support 100% of their own weight pre-engage, instead of having their feet way back and the second rowers/flankers holding them by pulling them back. This would result, I suspect, in scrums being packed higher and less collapsing. It would be worth a shot anyway. And I think it's exactly why there's not really many scrums collapsing at lower levels - because at lower levels, the props usually are just big fat guys from the pub who are supporting their own weight the whole time and never getting so low as a result.


:lol:


Imagine all of those posters who had no idea that Mog is the poster known as Ikaponthus?

Legend has it that his feet make a clippity clop noise when he sneaks into the house late at night.


I'm pretty sure everyone knows that. It has never been a secret. Same goes for my old username, everyone knows that too.
Last edited by Mog The Almighty on Sun Apr 30, 2017 1:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.

BBB
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by BBB »

jolindien wrote:
BBB wrote:I'd bleed World Rugby of all its cash and siphon the money into Swiss bank accounts under the names of all my family members and close friends.

For a start.


and someone made a mod of you... how clever.

The word "dictator" is in the thread title.
Also,I'm not a mod.

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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Insane_Homer »

tackle below the armpits.

attacking chaser cannot jump for a kick, only the defender.

catching a kick with your foot in touch means you took into touch.

starting 15 players to play all of the match, bench only for injury replacements.

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Jim Lahey
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Jim Lahey »

Insane_Homer wrote:tackle below the armpits.

attacking chaser cannot jump for a kick, only the defender.

catching a kick with your foot in touch means you took into touch.

starting 15 players to play all of the match, bench only for injury replacements
.


Agree 100%.
No overweight 'impact' forwards who are just wrecking balls.
Although I'd imagine there would be too many bloodgate scenarios.

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Demilich
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Demilich »

Embezzle all the money. Use some for pay-offs to consolidate my position and keep the plebs in line. Spend the rest of my time throwing sexy parties.

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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Anonymous. »

Mog The Almighty wrote:If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?.

Ban the Burka for safety reasons

Gwenno
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Gwenno »

Insane_Homer wrote:tackle below the armpits.

attacking chaser cannot jump for a kick, only the defender.

catching a kick with your foot in touch means you took into touch.

starting 15 players to play all of the match, bench only for injury replacements.

What about both feet?

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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Brumby_in_Vic »

catching a kick with your foot in touch means you took into touch.


That changed in Super Rugby this year

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qYbs7fCBD2w

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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by The Man Without Fear »

1). Any try which is followed by a blast of music over the PA results in immediate disallowal and a penalty in front of the posts for the opposition.

2). A try means a try at goal once more.

3). Compulsory shelf strengthening for all.

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Clive Simms
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Re: If you were dictator of global rugby, what would you do?

Post by Clive Simms »

Each side is allowed a power play of three extra players on the pitch for 10 minutes

Locked