I have no idea what you are rambling on about. Take forty winks.

You remind me of the Dad in the M. Night Shym-aliens episode of Rick and Morty.

you have no idea ?

Poor old Management ...

does she spend a lot of time with the BBC ?

I think you've overstepped the mark there BR

Christ Yeeb

Kindly do not take his name in vain. That's Christ, not Yeeb.

I'm built of sterner stuff, so it's not a big deal.

That's what he's missing. A big deal. You have to have intelligence to do that. He's apparently lacking in that department.

Not sure what you're on about, but

I am in the swamp on this one.

I was always a bit miffed that my tennis partner was about 1/2 inches taller than me.

Then she took her shoes off. Victory!

I think that's what Yeeb was suggesting

very good yeeb

Globus - you were a gag writer to the stars were you not? Yeeb's efforts would generally be out of the 'blue book'.

I wrote stuff for I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue, when Humph was the presenter.

I got the connection through the late Gerry Bron and that my dad used to do the accounts for Chris Barber.

Life is a complicated business. I have always found that cultivating people within a circle is a good way to go.

Now. I'm in the process of doing a modern "Flash Mob". Got the dance teacher on board and her husband who films and edits.

So we are heading there. Struggling with the music and that's my job.

At the moment I am running with a start with "Upside Down" by Chic and, of course, Diana Ross.

Suggestions are always welcolmed.

Ah, so you were the brains behind 'Samantha'. Yeeb's stuff is quite tame in comparison.

Mornington crescent would be a closer fit to globby's pointless, meandering aimless prose style

Not really.

I did write the one about the "old archivists" (appropriate) and the one about her underlying appearance from beneath a ladder.

However, Ian Naismith writes most of it with his team.

I miss Humph. Enormously.

Reasonable.

And fair.

I was at a recording when they went off on this one and Sandi Toksvig had just joined.

The bit, which was never broadcast, about the Royal Family was totally off the hill.

I have pretty well all of Humph's allusions to Samantha.

Including a reference to ice cream. Now fellas. Look that up.

Samantha has to nip out to spend time with her new gentleman friend. They’re off on a driving tour of Wales. She says he’s looking forward to showing her Cardiff and Cardigan Bay, before going on to Bangor in the back of his van.

It's quite famously humph's last joke on the show.

(Well it is famous for me at least) geek.

That's literally the first gag that comes up if you Google "I'm sorry I haven't a clue Samantha"

I can state quite honestly that I typed that up from memory, which is fading a bit.

Now. Find the ice-cream man.

I wrote a terrible joke years ago. It's about somewhere. But I am a busy bloke today and cannot be bothered to find the link.

As you may well know, Samantha never existed. Jon Naismiths apologies are well recorded. (I got his Christian name wrong.)

Samantha has to nip out to spend time with her new gentleman friend. They’re off on a driving tour of Wales. She says he’s looking forward to showing her Cardiff and Cardigan Bay, before going on to Bangor in the back of his van.

I've just copied and pasted this from the article in the link below. You've got it word for word identical, including punctuation which I find remarkable, especially given your normal idiosyncratic use of commas.

I was aware of the ice cream joke as I said above, but for your edification it's in the same article.

https://www.google.co.uk/amp/www.indepe ... html%3famp

Word for word hey?

It seems Globus must have written for Viz too: Aldridge Prior

Indeed. Getting your nose in up there is a bit much.

You would think he would have learned from his 'family recipe' saga

You guys are the morons for feeding him. What the hell to do get out of it?

Jesus Yeeb

A 'you'???

You're presumably not around that much on our day shift. He can, within seconds, turn a thread entirely into whatever subject he's decided to shoehorn into it. Incessantly. Even if it means replying to himself.

I put him on ignore for a bit, but that doesn't work thanks to the quote function.

The only chance of laying into him is by catching him out in a whopper, and as he's impervious to shame and they won't ban him, it's all we've got.

Pity, cos he's an interesting and erudite poster, especially if you're into crosswords.

Ignore works just fine. People only tend to quote his most outrageous brags etc, telling people he's more interesting than them blah blah. You get all the fun and little of the real tedium.

Another first google result mince pie

I'm still about and I challenge those who choose to have a go.

Up to you but really there must be teenagers out there.

What a load of codswallop.

Why do you need to do it globby? I believe you've had an interesting and varied life so why embellish it so much.

Do you really expect me to believe that, despite your fading memory, you typed out verbatim the piece above, despite it being the first thing on Google.

I'd be upset if my 10 yr old nephew resorted to such blatant plagiarism

Wot?

Which part of the posts bove or below, are you finding it difficult to comprehend?

I give up. It's ok. I just never did any of this. And I do not care if you think otherwise.

Here's a conundrum for you. What ??????????? That will provide hours of brain teasing and no element of result.

I don't fib,

I do wish people would stop making things up.

Keep swinging.

You can't lay a finger on me.

As a 10 I am used to dealing with your sort and Thurrock backrows.

Right I am off to play the saxophone.

I have installed a pressure sensor to my sax key guard so that door number 3 in my triple fronted garage opens every time I play the solo in Gerry Rafferty's Baker Street.

I actually organised a mortgage for Bob Holness

I have a life. Try getting one.

Not bad, but I never met Bob.

"Give me a P Bob"

If you did go on there, bob would ask you "What C, are you ?"

"What 'P' is the act of taking the work or an idea of someone else and passing it off as one's own?"

Globby's Golden run - can anyone do it ?

TRFC - a team
BS - nocturnal activity
IL - Schindler did this
TTS - in the garden
CWTMD - electro percussion
GAL - oft given advice

You clearly do not know how life works in reality.