PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

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happyhooker
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by happyhooker »

Tussock wrote:So... I haven't been a prolific poster... but I've been stalking the forum for about 10+ years...

Fallen into a bit of a dark hole recently... marriage breakdown... career change... lack of a clear pathway... brought on by Xmas period... usually surrounded by family... this year... feeling alone. Trying to work through with a few contacts.
where are you based tussock?
Tussock
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Tussock »

Winnie wrote:
backrow wrote:
Don’t worry about that - just skimmed your post history, saw you are from Nz...

:uhoh:
:lol: :lol:
Look after yourself Tussock
Dont be shy to let your thoughts go in here

I'm in a dark place at the moment myself with the old health anxiety, going back to the Dr on Friday :thumbdown: its always therapeutic to share with the people in this thread even if its just typing things out for your own mental health
Cheers Winnie. Take care.
Tussock
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Tussock »

happyhooker wrote:
Tussock wrote:So... I haven't been a prolific poster... but I've been stalking the forum for about 10+ years...

Fallen into a bit of a dark hole recently... marriage breakdown... career change... lack of a clear pathway... brought on by Xmas period... usually surrounded by family... this year... feeling alone. Trying to work through with a few contacts.
where are you based tussock?
Out of Melbourne
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Pat the Ex Mat
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Pat the Ex Mat »

We're here anytime mate :thumbup:
Tussock
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Tussock »

Pat the Ex Mat wrote:We're here anytime mate :thumbup:
Thanks Pat
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DragonKhan
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by DragonKhan »

Tussock wrote:So... I haven't been a prolific poster... but I've been stalking the forum for about 10+ years...

Fallen into a bit of a dark hole recently... marriage breakdown... career change... lack of a clear pathway... brought on by Xmas period... usually surrounded by family... this year... feeling alone. Trying to work through with a few contacts.
Hope you're doing alright. It can be a very tough time of year in the best of circumstances. Career changes can really fudge with your mojo (happened to me) and you lose all sense of normal with everything else going on with your life right now.

I struggled with loneliness for years and didn't really talk to people about it so you're already ahead of me in that regard! Lol


Hope everyone has a great Xmas and appreciates the ones they have around them (even the annoying ones) as you never know what will happen in life

I'm feeling a bit sad but not for me, my uncle and 4 cousins are all about to have their first Xmas with their aunt (my mum's sister). It was a very sudden and unexpected death and one of the girls is meant to be sitting her leaving cert and I am just so sad for all of them. I want to help but feel a little helpless as they're all back home in Ireland and I am stuck in Hull this Xmas.
Nolanator
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Nolanator »

Jesus. There was stories, and then there's this
DragonKhan wrote: and I am stuck in Hull this Xmas.
My deepest sympathies.





:P
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DragonKhan
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by DragonKhan »

Nolanator wrote:Jesus. There was stories, and then there's this
DragonKhan wrote: and I am stuck in Hull this Xmas.
My deepest sympathies.





:P
:lol:

I did walk right into that one. Merry Christmas Nolanator
Tussock
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Tussock »

DragonKhan wrote:
Tussock wrote:So... I haven't been a prolific poster... but I've been stalking the forum for about 10+ years...

Fallen into a bit of a dark hole recently... marriage breakdown... career change... lack of a clear pathway... brought on by Xmas period... usually surrounded by family... this year... feeling alone. Trying to work through with a few contacts.
Hope you're doing alright. It can be a very tough time of year in the best of circumstances. Career changes can really fudge with your mojo (happened to me) and you lose all sense of normal with everything else going on with your life right now.

I struggled with loneliness for years and didn't really talk to people about it so you're already ahead of me in that regard! Lol


Hope everyone has a great Xmas and appreciates the ones they have around them (even the annoying ones) as you never know what will happen in life

I'm feeling a bit sad but not for me, my uncle and 4 cousins are all about to have their first Xmas with their aunt (my mum's sister). It was a very sudden and unexpected death and one of the girls is meant to be sitting her leaving cert and I am just so sad for all of them. I want to help but feel a little helpless as they're all back home in Ireland and I am stuck in Hull this Xmas.
Thanks DragonKhan. Well said. Take care.
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Nolanator »

DragonKhan wrote:
Nolanator wrote:Jesus. There was stories, and then there's this
DragonKhan wrote: and I am stuck in Hull this Xmas.
My deepest sympathies.





:P
:lol:

I did walk right into that one. Merry Christmas Nolanator
:thumbup:
Have a good one.
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Salanya
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Salanya »

Keeping this thread on the first page, as the coming week will be tricky for some...

...especially for those living in Hull, Skegness, Luton etc. etc.
backrow
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by backrow »

Luton is fine , had a cracking 4 years there which considering I’d just lost my mum, was pretty good.
It’s extremely cheap and near to London :thumbup:
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Sydvicious
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Sydvicious »

This will be my 2nd Christmas without my kids. It sucks... it really sucks balls.
It's actually made me dreading the festive period and just willing it to be over.
argus
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by argus »

Sydvicious wrote:This will be my 2nd Christmas without my kids. It sucks... it really sucks balls.
It's actually made me dreading the festive period and just willing it to be over.
My first

My ex idea of splitting the holidays is for her to have the kids over Christmas and I have them over New Year. Lol

Still better than being married to her though

Best wishes to all here
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nuffsaid
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by nuffsaid »

Best wishes for Christmas everyone :thumbup:
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GWO2
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by GWO2 »

Not moaning, just taking the opportunity to get it off my chest. I will be so glad to see Christmas over, as my wife`s memory deteriorates even faster.We have made up bags of presents for our children and grand children, but, I have had to go back and explain which parcel is for who and what we have put in each parcel, four or five times in an hour. Even though we have labelled each parcel.She will then settle down , and then a few hours later get up and when I ask her what`s the problem, She turns and says just checking, then I have to explain it all again.It is so hard knowing how intelligent and organised she has always been. Still that`s the way it is, and I know it`s It is going to get worse. I`m coping ok at the moment as I blank the future and cope with the present.

Feel better getting that out there.
MERRY XMAS ALL.
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shabadoo
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by shabadoo »

GWO2 wrote:Not moaning, just taking the opportunity to get it off my chest. I will be so glad to see Christmas over, as my wife`s memory deteriorates even faster.We have made up bags of presents for our children and grand children, but, I have had to go back and explain which parcel is for who and what we have put in each parcel, four or five times in an hour. Even though we have labelled each parcel.She will then settle down , and then a few hours later get up and when I ask her what`s the problem, She turns and says just checking, then I have to explain it all again.It is so hard knowing how intelligent and organised she has always been. Still that`s the way it is, and I know it`s It is going to get worse. I`m coping ok at the moment as I blank the future and cope with the present.

Feel better getting that out there.
MERRY XMAS ALL.
f**king sucks dude. Ca't imagine going through that.

Fair play for getting it out there. :thumbup:
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Wendigo7
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Wendigo7 »

GWO2 wrote:Not moaning, just taking the opportunity to get it off my chest. I will be so glad to see Christmas over, as my wife`s memory deteriorates even faster.We have made up bags of presents for our children and grand children, but, I have had to go back and explain which parcel is for who and what we have put in each parcel, four or five times in an hour. Even though we have labelled each parcel.She will then settle down , and then a few hours later get up and when I ask her what`s the problem, She turns and says just checking, then I have to explain it all again.It is so hard knowing how intelligent and organised she has always been. Still that`s the way it is, and I know it`s It is going to get worse. I`m coping ok at the moment as I blank the future and cope with the present.

Feel better getting that out there.
MERRY XMAS ALL.
Poor sod.

I wouldn't know what to say, but it's nice to see you expressing it freely.
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GWO2
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by GWO2 »

That is the best thing about this page, it gives you the opportunity to ease the pressure and get it off your chest. Genuinely feel better for it. :thumbup:
aitch@wasps
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by aitch@wasps »

Amazing how, reading other’s experiences puts ones own into perspective.
My dad died at the end of May. He’d had surgery to remove a supposedly cancerous (we never had confirmation) growth from his right lung (he never smoked) but came out of it with post surgical delirium which was horrendous. He then needed additional surgery to remove more lung as it had atrophied because instead of the usual two veins taking depleted blood away from the lung he only had one so the used blood was just lingering. Then he needed a pacemaker inserted as he’d had some ‘incident’ on the operating table (never found out what that was all about either). All the while he was still suffering the delirium, being violent to nursing staff etc. pulling out tubes and suchlike, had to have restraints which was awful to see. He was then stabilised sufficiently to be moved to a more local hospital where my mom could visit more frequently and eventually, after a couple of months in critical care, he was moved onto a general ward (should have gone to a high dependency unit but somehow didn’t?). The delirium had subsided a bit and he was responding to physio well and seemed to be recovering but then he just died one morning.

So that was that.

Then my mother-in-law started needing medical treatment for repeated UTI’s or related issues. This is particularly irksome as we have been imploring her to increase her fluid intake, as did the docs but she’s loathed to get up off her arse to go for a pee! :roll: She now has a catheter, that’ll teach her.

The one thing all these experiences have taught us is to get our shit in order. I’ve already started both the medical and financial power of attorney stuff for myself. My mum is still sorting out paperwork (she’s a bit of a hoarder so it’s a long process!) but everything is ‘on hold’ now until after Christmas. This is not ideal and I want to get everything sorted because none of us know when the inevitable will happen but I’ve already been accused of bullying so have to let others go at their own pace...

I guess doing all the practical stuff is my coping mechanism. The new year will hopefully reignite momentum!
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happyhooker
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by happyhooker »

Aitch, sorry to here that. You're damn right about getting paperwork in order.

I buried my dad yesterday and always felt a bit of a fraud using this page to vent on, but it did help massively, so apologies and thanks for the intrusion
aitch@wasps
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by aitch@wasps »

happyhooker wrote:Aitch, sorry to here that. You're damn right about getting paperwork in order.

I buried my dad yesterday and always felt a bit of a fraud using this page to vent on, but it did help massively, so apologies and thanks for the intrusion
No apologies necessary but thanks all the same. Watch out for bastard solicitors fees etc when it comes to your father’s estate (assuming there is one), the solicitor my father named in his will tried to charge my mom extortionate amounts for not doing much at all (twas all pretty straightforward) so we kicked them into touch pdq.
One resource we found particularly useful was the government’s Tell us Once service, worth checking out.

There is so much that needs doing following a death and we really should be taught these things in school (with updates for legal issues).

Condolences...
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Kiwias
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Kiwias »

aitch

Condolences and your comments about getting stuff in order rings a bell. WHen my dad died a couple of years back, we were lucky that my older brother spend heaps of time with Dad in the last year or so going over stuff and getting it sorted. Even then we had a whole lot of things to get done after he died.
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by alliswell »

GWO2 wrote:Not moaning, just taking the opportunity to get it off my chest. I will be so glad to see Christmas over, as my wife`s memory deteriorates even faster.We have made up bags of presents for our children and grand children, but, I have had to go back and explain which parcel is for who and what we have put in each parcel, four or five times in an hour. Even though we have labelled each parcel.She will then settle down , and then a few hours later get up and when I ask her what`s the problem, She turns and says just checking, then I have to explain it all again.It is so hard knowing how intelligent and organised she has always been. Still that`s the way it is, and I know it`s It is going to get worse. I`m coping ok at the moment as I blank the future and cope with the present.

Feel better getting that out there.
MERRY XMAS ALL.
Well buddy that is proper shit. My mother is in early ish stages of Alzheimer's and on her bad days she struggles with things as simple as making a cup of tea. It is horrible to see bits of her falling away like a wet cake.

I know that you have said in the past that you don't want to say anything to your kids but they need to know how hard it is on you so you can share the load a little bit at least. In saying that I am a massive hypocrite because I have never discussed anything about 'feelings' with my father but I really wish one of us had the balls to be honest about how shit the situation is.
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happyhooker
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by happyhooker »

aitch@wasps wrote:
happyhooker wrote:Aitch, sorry to here that. You're damn right about getting paperwork in order.

I buried my dad yesterday and always felt a bit of a fraud using this page to vent on, but it did help massively, so apologies and thanks for the intrusion
No apologies necessary but thanks all the same. Watch out for bastard solicitors fees etc when it comes to your father’s estate (assuming there is one), the solicitor my father named in his will tried to charge my mom extortionate amounts for not doing much at all (twas all pretty straightforward) so we kicked them into touch pdq.
One resource we found particularly useful was the government’s Tell us Once service, worth checking out.

There is so much that needs doing following a death and we really should be taught these things in school (with updates for legal issues).

Condolences...
Tell us once is indeed excellent.

Fortunately one of my sisters is a lawyer, so we avoided many of the pitfalls there and my mum is still going, which simplifies things.
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Floppykid
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Floppykid »

Shit like this really sucks eh?
I've been avoiding the thread to just compartmentalise and focus on other things but I thought I'd pop in anyway.
You turn on the tap and it's hard to turn off again. :|

I'm in a similar boat with my mom, though she doesn't have dementia or anything like that.
This Christmas is going to be bittersweet and very odd for all of us.

My Aunt, who's in the early-mid stages of Dementia will be attended, so I know what a terrible disease it is.

Do your best at Christmas guys, hope it goes as well as it can.
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Wendigo7
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Wendigo7 »

So I have some good news from my post earlier on a couple of pages back with regards to my old man.

So, long story short, he has very few to no symptoms since the fall (or attack.. I haven't decided which). The main issue is slightly odd, where by when he lies down his blood pressure is 165, when he stands up it's only 120. That seems very peculiar.. can't imagine what causes that. He also appears to have lost a slight sense of taste and has to monitor his water/fluid intake. However, from a personal perspective, he's essentially normal.

Just chuffed to bits he's still around really, but that's the second time in his life he's had a life threatening injury, a second time he's gone in the medical journal for a miraculous recovery in a couple of days or so due to self healing (first time was lung issues) and the second time he's completely injury free and no different than prior (or 99%).

:)
Nolanator
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Nolanator »

:thumbup: Good to hear.
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Wendigo7
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Wendigo7 »

Nolanator wrote::thumbup: Good to hear.
Thanks Nolan. Hope you have a good time in Southampton for christmas tomorrow :)
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feckwanker
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by feckwanker »

I suppose that there are certain things that put your life in perspective and what I heard yesterday was one of them.

My wife's boss'es (about 35) wife (she 33) gave birth to a child last Thursday. She died from an infection two days ago.

I don't even know the man but I'm devastated for him. My wife is very very upset. Hold your loved ones dear guys - every moment is precious.
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Nolanator »

Wendigo7 wrote:
Nolanator wrote::thumbup: Good to hear.
Thanks Nolan. Hope you have a good time in Southampton for christmas tomorrow :)
Hah, thanks. Back in Dublin this year. Had it in Southampton last year, though!
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Short Man Syndrome
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Short Man Syndrome »

To anyone who posts on this thread ‘sorry for moaning’ or ‘forgive me for this/that/other’ - pls know that you are immediately forgiven - no apology was necessary - and welcomed warmly.

A lot of people might not want to share their troubles here, but I’ve found a great deal of help and comfort from hearing that people have/are going through similar and, sadly, worse.

No-one is alone on this thread.
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Wyndham Upalot
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Wyndham Upalot »

Short Man Syndrome wrote:To anyone who posts on this thread ‘sorry for moaning’ or ‘forgive me for this/that/other’ - pls know that you are immediately forgiven - no apology was necessary - and welcomed warmly.

A lot of people might not want to share their troubles here, but I’ve found a great deal of help and comfort from hearing that people have/are going through similar and, sadly, worse.

No-one is alone on this thread.
Absolutely. I'm not in a best place at the moment, however without wanting to going into any detail, this forum offers a real solace. Thank you all and best wishes to everyone who is in a difficult time at the present.
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Short Man Syndrome
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Short Man Syndrome »

Wyndham Upalot wrote:
Short Man Syndrome wrote:To anyone who posts on this thread ‘sorry for moaning’ or ‘forgive me for this/that/other’ - pls know that you are immediately forgiven - no apology was necessary - and welcomed warmly.

A lot of people might not want to share their troubles here, but I’ve found a great deal of help and comfort from hearing that people have/are going through similar and, sadly, worse.

No-one is alone on this thread.
Absolutely. I'm not in a best place at the moment, however without wanting to going into any detail, this forum offers a real solace. Thank you all and best wishes to everyone who is in a difficult time at the present.
:thumbup:
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booji boy
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by booji boy »

Wendigo7 wrote:So I have some good news from my post earlier on a couple of pages back with regards to my old man.

So, long story short, he has very few to no symptoms since the fall (or attack.. I haven't decided which). The main issue is slightly odd, where by when he lies down his blood pressure is 165, when he stands up it's only 120. That seems very peculiar.. can't imagine what causes that. He also appears to have lost a slight sense of taste and has to monitor his water/fluid intake. However, from a personal perspective, he's essentially normal.

Just chuffed to bits he's still around really, but that's the second time in his life he's had a life threatening injury, a second time he's gone in the medical journal for a miraculous recovery in a couple of days or so due to self healing (first time was lung issues) and the second time he's completely injury free and no different than prior (or 99%).

:)
What a great Xmas gift. :thumbup:

Merry Xmas mate. Great news.
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booji boy
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by booji boy »

Not this thread in particular but when my sister in law passed away a couple of years ago this place was a great place to vent and the support and sympathy really helped. This place can seem like a lunatic asylum at times but when the chips are down PR really comes through for you.

Merry Xmas to all. :thumbup:
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mr bungle
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by mr bungle »

feckwanker wrote:I suppose that there are certain things that put your life in perspective and what I heard yesterday was one of them.

My wife's boss'es (about 35) wife (she 33) gave birth to a child last Thursday. She died from an infection two days ago.

I don't even know the man but I'm devastated for him. My wife is very very upset. Hold your loved ones dear guys - every moment is precious.
Did the wife die? Horrific.

Wishing you all a good one, ladies and gents.
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by towny »

GWO2 wrote:I`m glad I can come on here and tell my feelings as there is no way I would worry my children by burdening them with them.It is getting harder each day to watch my wife`s memory slip away (she has early onset of Alzhiemers disease).I have found it is no use trying to correct her when she remembers something that is wrong, as she gets so angry. I try and keep a brave face and tell her things are not as bad as she thinks, but, I find I am close to tears for the least thing all the time. She goes up to bed early each night and I often break down into tears when she`s in bed. The slightest thing can set me off, I was just looking on F/B and someone posted a link for Andrea Botcelli and Sarah Brightman singing Time to Say Goodbye and it`s started me off again. Fortunately, I suffer from extreme coughing bouts that leave me with red tear filled eyes so on the rare time she has caught me I can just tell her I have been coughing. But it really is getting hard to cope. If I get any worse I`ll have to get medical help.
Not looking for sympathy, just need to tell someone. I feel better already just writing it down on here.
Yeah. Good thing you have those violent coughing fits....

This thread! I don’t know if I have the courage to match any of you. Blew me away.
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Pat the Ex Mat
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Pat the Ex Mat »

I particularly dislike Xmas so it's always a struggle on the day.

Luckily having a new dog is helping a lot.
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Sydvicious
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Re: PR Depression, Anxiety and Suicidal

Post by Sydvicious »

Last year was the first Christmas without my kids and I thought that was one of the worst experiences ever. I have limited contact with them, but the longing for them is just amplified over the festive period.
This year, in addition to not being with them, I'm actually working as well.
I made a lot of mistakes (which put me in the position I'm in), but I wouldn't wish this on my enemies.
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